Age is a number

It is the nature of humans to reiterate the common favourite lines to be said on a particular occasion. It has to be, as we wish someone on a birthday, new year and anniversary etc. Those lines are used with somewhat changes, having the same fervour.

I have always heard many beautiful lines on such dates, in my case, also but one line being told at the time of retirement from service, has attracted me the most. The line always being told during wishing for happy retirement life is that – age is a number. Though this notion instils positivity yet we forget that facts reflect their shadow. The fact is that with every day, a number of changes in the present life and body, along with mental health occur. Such changes have effects. Otherwise, the retirement age should have been different or something else.

It is true regarding age, but we should remember that every number has a face value and has increasing or decreasing value relations with preceding and succeeding numbers. Likewise, the number in age has only increasing value in the preceding year in terms of experience, expectations, aspirations and responsibilities etc. The time, for self, decreases and attention towards a name or position, in most cases, gets priority over the future to be realities.

This phase of service life is getting professional advice in the present situation when the longevity of both female and male have increased because of congenial developments. The retiring persons are being imparted knowledge on savings, investments, expenditures and careful handling of lucrative offers in the digital world. These are important, because of limited sources of income and changing social and personal relations.

The most important requirement for the earlier active person after retirement is the engagement for the routine period earmarked for official engagement in service. There becomes a sudden vacuum.
They are considered exhausted.

Many suggestions for their engagement may be given but dignity, flexibility in duty hours and respect etc. should be taken care of. Most of the time, they are emotionally blackmailed and become prey to cheating people in the name of engagements. We forget that they are treasures of experience and are ready to share them. They may easily be ready to return to the society to which they feel indebted. A fully respectful system, for engaging them, is needed at the time.

They need care with the passage of time also. They should not be left unattended to feel neglected. Their healths deteriorate faster because of this. They become more dependent as the number in age increases. They become helpless and take shelter in old age homes, because of family problems or otherwise.

There is no controversy in considering that age is a number but this appears to be true in the case of such professions where separations are to be decided by self. In every profession, whatever engagement, separation has to happen and age has to reflect its effects.

Age is a number for counting. It has demands also. But positivity is there. Everyone should have it, as age has many things in store to return.

We should not forget that God is there and love is life. We should not forget that we are successors also, so we have ideas about age.


HAPPY NEW YEAR 2023 TO ALL MY FRIENDS

CHILD IN SEPARATION- A Story

Am I a broken soul? Do I have an entity? Why do you not break the news related to me, as breaking news, showing for many hours on your TV channels?

Such were dialogues in a stage drama in which a boy was pleading before the judge on the fates of children facing the separation of parents because of the so-called heinous divorce. It was that part of the drama in which the boy was to choose one between his father and mother to live with after their separation.

The boy was fully prepared to open his plights of life. These were social and psychological problems. The boy told with full emphasis, ” he is a living gender in the world of so-called civilized society. He should not be treated as a commodity meant for sale to one person only. He has a soul that is on the earth because of two souls who have decided to increase their family – my parents. I am not ready to miss any of them naturally or unnaturally. My mother is like earth to me, and my father is like a mentor to show me the world. I want both of them for my growth, development and sustainability.

I am a witness to the heydays of my parents’ lives. I may not accept them separately because I am not a culprit, if their attitudes change toward each other later in life, I should not bear the brunt. As a child, I have my dreams to be in life. My future is related to both of them. I need their guidance, support, and togetherness for every moment.

My parents are the judges who have decided to bring me to life. Now, I should be given the right to decide their separation which I never accept because of their changing attitudes. I do not want to be like a helpless and hopeless boy who does wait for a predetermined particular day and time to meet one of the parents having a tag of divorcees. I do not want the part-time love of my parents. I do not want to be seen in society with pity. I know a few friends facing such situations. They are having many problems, especially psychological ones dealing with day-to-day work. Even classmates and friends change their views towards a child like me while talking. I do not want to be distinguished like that. If the father or mother remarriages, the condition of the stepchild becomes more pathetic. The condition of a girl child, who is supposed to have lion’s share to carry forward all the stigma of family, religion, traditions and society, is worse in this situation.

In my view, no parents should be allowed, in any condition, to be separated if they bear a child. Their relationship should not affect the future of a child. I know nowadays, due to social changes and so many opportunities present, parenting is also changing but the ultimate sufferers are children. These are taking a toll on children. Such persons who want to marry and also want to be parents in the future are supposed to be mature enough to know their responsibilities in life. A child who witnesses their affection and well-thought approach should not be a victim in the future, in their lives, if any kind of problem arises. I am not a child of an animal. I need to fight differently for existence in the changing world and I have to learn from and live with my parents.

Our society does not have any system to tackle such children. A child like me is also the future of a nation. I want to be a doctor. Who will bear my expenses for the same? A projected cost of studies, in case of no solution and ultimate separation, should be deposited or otherwise in the direction of a respectable Court, with direction to the automatic, timely release of funds to the concerned child like me. A third party under the full supervision of the court should be given the onus to look after such children. I do not want to go to any orphanage or shelter homes where situations may not be congenial, as I have read about many unhappy incidents in such dwellings in news. I am supposed to be the best but I do not want to be the definite worst.

I should not be prey to the unnoticed reasons that culminate later in the married life of my parents. This is not the judgement that is on my price. This is a kind of death warrant for my life in the world that judges everyone on its standard. No child is ready for this. I may not talk to God but I may tell my mind here in this world. I am not the only sufferer; society is to suffer also and bear the consequences of this human-made crime. Psychological and social studies, on children like me, are of no use if not giving lessons or redressal to stop such venomous acts.

Finally, I think that this story may be repeated in a second marriage. Then again, a child may face the same situation.

At last, I want to live with both of them so my parents should be punished to live together forever in life or till I become able and become independent. I am positive in the hope that I will be the reason for the revival of their togetherness.”

The message in the drama was very clear to settle the differences in married life in view of the future of children.

Hasty decisions should be avoided and separation should be last to come to mind with the closure of all options to be under one roof. Moreover, decisions at every step in life, mainly after marriage, should be well thought out, discussed and analyzed to avoid future problems, especially those related to children. The future of a child should be ensured until he or she becomes independent.

You are needed

Trees fly chirping,
Birds, rooted in the earth,
Heroes, as stars in the sky,
Stars, twinkling on earth,
Clouds, in our hands,
Water, sprinkling on the sky.
We want shortcuts.

Time is in our control,
Birth needs submission,
Death needs permission,
We dig water,
We eat air,
Our heads are down,
Our wishes are willing.

Do we dream of these?
A full topsy-turvy.
Why do we want such things?
Our imaginations and aspirations play roles in defining life in all eras. We may not accomplish all, in one life. Our unfulfilled willingness is the hunter of hunger. They are crusaders. We want to change but not ourselves. We worship but sail our ships.

We never examine our roles. We assess others’ roles. We have made God- many Gods for our use. Real God is money. We have aspirations for a virtual world – full of fictitious things in the name of pleasure and comfort. We have written our chapters of life on our terms, satiating our whims. No one wants to surrender for peace and love.

God! your lessons of love and grace are bookish and in practicality are used for fears, curses and pretentious attitudes.

God! You are being tested every day. You are needed. Your silence is taking the price of humanity. You are supposed to tell that you are the creator and you are the annihilator. One day your existence may be questioned. No one has seen you? But we love you for our sake.

You are the only hope. Otherwise, I am the best. God! You will be only a concept. A concept for the supremacy of a few.

Life Like Sand

May I give thought to myself? I don’t want to disturb you every time. You are precious. But I do not know whether your time is yours or not. I think I should not know everything about everyone. This may cause psychological disorders and I may forget many things which need my attention for exploration of this world. Firstly, I have to explore myself. If I meet success in this journey, I have worth. But who will decide my success? I may have a series of questions. Decisions should be free of all encumbrances. Is it possible? Is it like art or creativity that everyone has something to deliver controlled by one’s concepts? Concepts do come from where? Who does give concept? What is the basis? It is sure that someone has deep exploratory thinking and gives some concepts. We accept that to avoid confusion as we do in examinations in student life. We write the accepted concepts to pass them. We may not give our thoughts because time remains limited and knowledge has to be assessed for future rat races. We are like lamb and think unidirectional. We may not think of compartments, to make whole. The system never allows us to be independent and to be ourselves. So when we start thinking of ourselves, it becomes too late in life. We spend maximum time analyzing others, both critically and affectionately depending upon relations or our comfortable approaches. We aim to get favour from every resource. We become selfish and forget ourselves.

I think we are having inner shadows veiling our realities, which may give more to the prevailing concepts. We may not get rid of such shadows until we have time for ourselves. I think creativity requires privacy, corner and zero disturbance. Life is not a business that may be sold with a sweet audible slogan. There may be an investment and someone is the investor. I think that the almighty is an investor. The almighty invested in us. He never asks for anything in return but only loves. Love of speaking truth, love of kindness, love of pardon and above all, love for each other. I think if we love each other we may explore anything. We don’t need someone to teach us, love. The best teacher, I think is a baby who loves unconditionally, not willing anything from everyone except the mother who is a multiplier of love. I think so. Mother does with love, in love, for continuity of love of hope of exploring the meaning of life someday by son or daughter of almighty. Mother is a path. Mother is a link between the invisible and visible worlds.

Love is an accepted fact for peace we should not spoil time and love each other. I think this is the only way to know oneself. The almighty will be more generous to bless us in this life. Firstly, one should judge self and assess others later. Life is like sand, not holdable at a fist. One should not wait and watch for others to take lead.

My role

I am in search of my role in this world. One may preach to me as per ones thinking. It is the easiest job to perform. The onus of outcomes of my role will be solely mine. I may bear it. I will have to bear it. But my next question will crop up for further roles. So my role appears to be unlimited. Then I may search limit of unlimited for peace.

I have played many roles in worldly affairs at certain times as per destiny. Does my destiny fix my role? Destiny has given livelihoods and relationships for nurturing the future of self and generations to come. I have played my roles, like an ant to hoard before the rainy day, like a cow to give milk to rear offsprings, like a lion to protect my supremacy and like a rose flower to spread good fragrance etc. I have played my roles during thick and thin. I have played roles for the happiness of my dependents. They have accepted me as per their need and they have become independent. I have donated to religious places to express my gratitude to the almighty. I do not know the fate of this act. I have given alms to the poor and needy. I may have not been hundred per cent successful for all. I have tried to go beyond my limit for all possible efforts but I am to play a role other than these roles to prove my birth’s meaning as I am the most developed creature of nature. So my question is valid, despite all roles being played.

I am searching for my real role and meaning in my birth. I do not want to be limited but unlimited to all and sundry. I want to be like the wind for breathing to every needy creature of nature. I want to be like fruits bearing trees to cater to the needs of all. I want to be like a flowing river to ultimately meet the ocean and lose my existence in it. I want a role to be part of the ocean of almighty like a drop of water. Before that, I want to be light to remove the darkness in my heart and mind.

My almighty this world has several distractions to curtain your presence. So in my next birth make me blind with your glimpses in my eyes only, as I am fed up with worldly affairs. I want only one role to be yours and for you, forever. May this be my last birth and I rest in you my almighty, in the deep ocean.

Life and Computer

My life has been like a computer, completely in control of others. Different software is controlling it at the fingertips. This software is often upgraded to be ahead of the competition with others. The CPU is inbuilt and invisible. I have no intelligence of mine. I am obedient but I am susceptible to outer polluting agents and need proper handling. Sometimes, I am hacked by mischievous enemies who want to corrupt me for their sake.

Humans have developed like a computer, from simple and huge to present day’s small, handy, complicated but easy to operate anywhere on the table or a lap etc.

Humans have intelligently handled situations but are surrendering to artificial intelligence in the interest of a brighter future. But we should not forget that God is super intelligent and we are computers, fully controlled by him. Our activities are as per his software.  He, sometimes, upgrades software to show his miracles through extraordinary activities. He is a real refresher.

When we grow in this world, we become susceptible to our surroundings and try to adapt and adopt. In due course, because of our unsaturated lusts in worldly affairs, some hackers with their established thoughts in the name of faith in God, mislead. We get addicted and seek aplomb in those polluting agents. We forget the meaning of life. Even God’s artificial agents like wind, water, day, night and changing temperatures fail in showing the real path of peace and happiness.

God has encrypted his massages in every human to be studied in time. Those who understand them early, do something differently. They never become part of the crowd. They are real pathfinders. Every discovery made in the world was in existence but became known to the world because of differently thinking people. 

In this world, God’s encrypted messages of trust, honesty, sacrifice and truth, never change. At any age, they never change. These are the hardware of God’s computer. They may be refined with time without modifying their essence.

It is our duty to fit into the changing world with the gifts of God. The day someone, who controls self wit and nerves, becomes free from others to be with God. No virus may corrupt the file of God. God has full control to crash any computer, at his will. He is supreme. He is the server of all servers.

Helplessness

Grief is my grievance.
Wealth is my mirage.
Wage is my incentive.
Pleasure is my flower.
Peace is my need.
The fight is my end.
Might is my dedication.
Honesty is my friend.
Jealous is my degradation.
Anger is my downfall.
Justice is my right.
Defeat is my firmness.
Failure is my path.
Comfort is my superstition.
Laziness is my enemy.
Proudness is my confusion.
Greed is my illusion.
Lust is my continuity.
Senses are my hindrance.
Knowledge is my weakness.
Wisdom is my foolishness.
Tension is my earning.
Wish is my loneliness.
Fear is my hurdle.
Word is my condition.
Expression is my emotion.
The mood is my sedition.
Truth is my problem.
Thought is my revolution.
The decision is my resistance.
Growth is my temporary phase.
Love is my will.
Generosity is my life.
Worshipping is my belief.
Religion is my faith.

I am sinking and the world is interpreting me like that. I am loosing my chance and the world is advancing like that. I am meeting the challenges and the world is changing. I am moving and the world is fixing like that. I am revealing and the world is assessing me like that. I am meaning and the world is reacting like that.

I am in the hand of the world. I am in the hand of circumstances. I want to be your pet my almighty. Here people hate living ones and love dead people. I am alive so they don’t love me. Their selfless love is nothing but show. Their respect is positional in working and conditional in notions. Their religions are situational and used as weapons of love and hate. Their worship is far from you – the reality. Greatness is their hidden agenda. You are divided. We are divided. I am helpless. May almighty make everything only one to avoid any conflict. May the world be in God’s reset mode.   

Departure – A story for compromise

Where have we reached? Which direction are we going? Have we expected this? I was with my oldest friend. We started our lives together on this earth on the same date in the same village. What a miracle we are together since then – in school, in service and after retirement. So we are one soul. We know each other better than our parents.

God has given us full support with his blessings. But at the last stage of life, my friend is very disturbed because of his granddaughter. She was good in health and wealth but her married life’s conditions took the shelter of court for friendly separation after three years of married life. He was perturbed. Whatever was earlier considered unacceptable, is happening friendly nowadays. No one wants to compromise or tolerate odds. Why should only I? This question is worse than hell. In our time society, relatives and family members could not tolerate or accept such thinking. Marriage means, being together forever. It is made in heaven. But, now it has a different approach. My life is mine. My decision is for my welfare. My and I are first. My family and your family or many other factors are also playing roles.

All changes in the thinking and society took full review in our minds. We were happy and together in paucity.  Now, our limitations appeared lovely. We had roots intact and love to love all. Our homes were first on the priority list. Our expectations and anticipations were close-knit with family, friends and society. 

We accept that women have been the worst sufferers due to full dependency on males in the family.  We had realised it in our lives at early stages. We had seen restrictions on girl students – no more movements, no liberty, limited education and full obedience. We had read about many improvements but problems were there because of a lack of education and independence. We had realised the position of women in villages and encouraged our daughters to get full education for independence.

We accept that our daughters took care of their daughters and our granddaughters are financially independent, ready to take decisions and courageous to face problems. They are doing better and giving messages to be educated. They have taken the opportunities.

We are both friends and have witnessed developments and growth in resources of education and support to girls to be free of plights seen by their predecessors. But a new type of problem differentiating villages and cities in regards to the availability of essential facilities has taken place. Villagers went to cities, though living in miserable situations there, did not want to return to their native places. Old people from the village may not live with their sons and relatives in the city because of outsiders’ feelings, restrictions and lack of a healthy climate etc.

Everyone in the village was having a relationship, and helping attitude during thick and thin. They were one. They had news of all. These things are missing in cities. Most of the population migrated from villages, like leaves separated from original trees and flying with the mercy of the wind. So, the history of many families is not known in the city. But in villages, such is not the case of missing family history. These all help in making discussions and taking decisions. It is very informative for an institution like marriage. It is somewhat missing in cities. Most of the marriages are solemnised only on discussions between the two aspirants or through matrimonial sites where the roles of elders in the family are to agree only. After marriages, in most cases, turmoil starts because of a lack of submission, compromise, healthy dialogue and huge differences in views. Besides these financial matters, male dominating ego, financial independence of females and family’s interference on both sides are also aggravating the relationships. Then the roles of courts for separations and freedom from misery come.

My oldest friend’s granddaughter was also prey to all such nuances and the matter was in court for friendly separation. But separation is always harmful and should not be encouraged. Two families lose good time, money, and healthy society structures. The children of such families suffer the most. My friend was very upset about the deteriorating values of life. We are the example to foreigners of centuries-old family values and cultures. They are adopting our values and we are accepting their ” use and throw ” lifestyles. What a pity? 

My friend was weeping and I could only console him. We could only help each other. We know that the reasons may be many but education has to control the mind and thinking. In the education system, another English system is playing a role? Perhaps, we may never see daughter-in-law, mother-in-law and grandmother-in-law together to retain the traditions and culture. No doubt, everyone matters but compromise may not be ruled out. We compromise at every place – education, working places, and otherwise. But we do not want to compromise on the most important aspect of life. Why? The ego of being male or female?

Earlier we had come across a case where the husband was jailed for mischief in married life, but compromise got a place after discussion and the couple is living together. Ugly separation should be the last option.

My friend said no one may be perfect with all qualities but live together with all odds, with willpower. Arguments and differences are spices in life. Now life is not easy. It is full of tension, leading to depression. Psychological problems and monetary situations are playing roles in life. We know the repercussions of fiscal positions in behaviours. We in the village face it but have the satisfaction of not purchasing everything from the market for living and meeting both ends. Most of us have our own house and produce our items for food. We live with limited resources. But in the city where payment has to be made for everything, fiscal conditions affect life and such situations may arise if there are differences in views of life in marriage. During the economic recession, we found the end of many families in many countries due to the bankruptcy of many industries and fiscal institutions etc. Such separation was rampant.

My friend became more serious and said we should take care of the future from the very beginning of service because in this world money matters more than relationships. It may bring peace at every stage of life. It may stop separation on any basis. We have travelled from the combined to the nuclear family stage. No one is ready to sacrifice for life. Growth in a career in service is more important than family. Even children are considered a hurdle in life. Is it life where no one is to share or cheer emotions of life? We are becoming a machine. Now, education on our social and moral values is a must to avoid such separations.

I agreed with my friend but not completely. This difference is the basis of our friendship. We fight but discuss the reasons for the fight. We never forget our smiles.

Engagement

We have divided day and night into twenty-four hours. We have most of these times for ourselves. Even then, we think of some engagement for the rest of the time we feel free. The rest of the time is a main controlling enzyme of the quality of life we lead. This controls the “me” time of an individual for the whole life.

Everyone has complete time for themselves in childhood. That time decreases as the age grows but twenty-four hours of day and night remain static. Everyone has to adjust the life every day within this stipulated duration. The making or devastation of life depends on self-controlled activities. So the activities should be well planned considering all  prospects. If they are governed by moral values, the future of individuals and society, in turn, will be progressive, free of all sorts of shortcomings. Otherwise, the reverse is also possible in life, due to immoral practices.

The moment selfishness overshadows all positive norms, the trouble starts, greediness occupies front seats and life becomes hell. These types of thoughts ruin the present and future of family and society.

The past of life is mainly influenced by the behaviours and attitudes of parents, friends and relatives. The best of those should be taken for building the life in the present. This legacy is passed on like that from generation to generation. The dominance of positivity in actions, emotions and attitudes etc. makes life heaven and peace prevails in the surrounding. The godly environment inculcates thoughts – live and let live- everywhere. There may always be additions in life. This type of engagement we may get from religious thoughts.

Engagements should be both professional and personal. Personal engagements, controlled by mental ability and maturity, give direction to all types of engagements. Professional engagements give means to survive and do good for society. Purposeful life depends on both in the changing world.

Sitting idle without ideals is harmful. Engagement is a must. Otherwise, life will be like stagnant water. Stagnant water becomes rotten. Thinking, for the betterment of humanity, should be a continuous process with respect to developments. Short goals pave the path for large goals. These are steps on a stair to reach on top to see the world and give return gifts to the society which has given opportunities and meaning to one’s life.
What the world, we find at present, is built by deep thoughts of ancestors in a progressive manner. We should have similar types of thoughts for engagements.

The negative thoughts may ruin self-life. Selfless is always better than selfishness. The present is the gate to the future. The present demands utmost utilization. What we sow so we reap. The fruit of action may not be personal.

Engagement is extremely private and a privilege of every individual. But its effects may be long-lasting. We may take a few qualities from nature’s creatures for timely engagements. Engagement is the necessary content of life. We should be engaged both mentally and professionally. Engagements as per interests fetch pleasures and satisfactions. The best engagement is forgetting self for others’ welfare. Even God loves it as the first step towards salvation.

Daughter

She comes,
She smiles,
She touches,
She holds,
She hugs,
She cares,
She gives me a name.

She is my friend,
She is my life,
She is my destiny,
She is my love,
She is my flower,
She is my fragrance,
She is my light,
She is my twittering bird,
She is my face ,
She has given me purpose,
She is my blessing,
She is my daughter.

Her future is my future,
Her sound is my path,
Her journey is my journey,
Her smile is my treasure.

She has to fly,
I have to give her wings.
She has to be traditional,
I have to give her rituals,
She has to be for sure,
I have to give her opportunities.
She has her own identity,
I have to give her strength.
She is a gender,
I have to make her perfect.
She is the maker,
I have to give her time.

She should be self,
She should be a book,
She should be easy,
She should be tough,
She should be water,
She should be wind,
She should be earth,
She should be open,
She should be closed,
She should be medium,
She should be maker,
She should be power,
She should be inspiration.

She should be for others,
She should be creative,
She should be for nature,
But she should be for her own.