I have “me” in myself. This me of mine is the root cause of all types of greed, distress and diseases.
When I was an infant, I was with my mother only. I always wanted to be with her only. She was my world for everything.
She was my life jacket in the world of problems from my first day on this earth. I learned to swim in this oceanic world under the supervision of my mother. She was my heaven. I was only comfortable with her.
When first time I was sent to school I felt alone. My troubles started with learning the first letter of the alphabet in my mother tongue. I started facing worldly vices. My mother made me acquainted with such affairs and gave me lessons to cope with them.
One day my mother left me alone in this world for her invisible journey to another world. I became an orphan and easy prey to all nuances of society. I turned from good to bad and from bad to worse and worst. I forgot to control my tongue and master the time for the sake of me. I could not behave like a sieve to be like a sage.
I was always right on the wrong side. Earlier, I had searched for myself in my mother but now without my mother, I had been a demon with harming tendencies. All earlier teachings were futile. I changed as per my needs and became more selfish. I had lost myself in me.
My love for myself had been a curse later in life. I wanted to regret and regain my childhood notions and thoughts. I wanted my mother to be with me again. But this was not possible.
I did not know the history of souls. My mind had a plethora of thoughts like waves in the ocean. I wanted to use my waves for me and for peace in life. I had recalled my mother’s teaching, – “the new path starts from where you become helpless and confused about life and devote yourself to the almighty. Then he takes care.”
I have surrendered to almighty for his shelter. This time my me is not for myself but for selflessness. My me has submerged into almighty. I have restricted myself to a minimum for living and requirements. My thoughts start with him and end with him – the almighty. My me is for your cause.
Now I am yours. Sorry, I have never asked – ” how are you “? I am pity on myself for losing you. My repentance may please be accepted for me.