The Gap

I think that every gap reveals something like continuity or something like discontinuity. It may also tell about the endeavours of something to achieve. The gap may be natural or man-made but is found everywhere. The natural gap, depending upon many factors, may be abridged, but the human-made gaps in humanity control nature and humans’ history of concepts or developments or conflicts. Both types of gaps have common features. They separate. They are also important to give a fillip to think and plan for betterment.

I think that the gap is more evident in human history. I have interacted with at least four generations. I have seen changes. I have listened to the changes. I have heard different stories from my grandparents and learnt about their tough lives. They were physically strong and had faced adversaries. They had time for themselves, relationships and humanity. They were mentally strong also. My parents were in a better position than my grandparents in many aspects but not in terms of the facilities that my generation had.

If we conclude thinking, it becomes evident that every generation thinks of facing more trouble and lesser opportunities than the preceding generation. It may be true but not for every aspect.

Older generations had many things limited and even not easily available. They had less with more satisfaction and were alive to humanity with miserable situations. They had close-knit interdependent societies. Their plights may be known from the study of the literature of their times.

I had seen, in my generation, the first single-lane tar road making in my town in the mid-seventies and electricity in the early eighties. After that, when the economy of our country got a boost, then lives started changing in all fields because of developments. The distance in space and time got reduced from hours, and minutes to seconds. We have a lot from the biggest to nono and pocket-sized technologies. The changes in all aspects of life have affected our generation a lot. Our needs increased manifold in terms of greed. We have gained many things in the form of problems. Our developments have brought comfort and ease in life, along with many conflicts and dissatisfaction. We have lost our peace and our temperament developed regarding questioning the rituals for scientific proof. Even age-old beliefs are doubted. All such activities have made miserable situations for the present generation, giving rise to unnecessary tension.

The present new generation is more informed than older generations but not channelized for stipulated results due to a lack of proper guidance. It has resulted in a thematic approach and sectoral attitudes in social harmony endangering humanity. We do not have sharing attitudes and time for others. We want fast lives and multilane roads with dividers but never try to think of accidents due to hurrying habits. We want everything at once. We are trying to unveil the secrets of the universe but are not ready to learn the meaning of life. We have given control of our lives to various technologies and artificial gadgets and are becoming a slave. Even the mind is guided by others.

We should not forget that despite all developments and self-reliance in many requirements’ fulfilment, every generation has common problems of hunger and basic needs. The brain needs food and the hand needs engagement. Both needs of the physique should be healthy and positive. Above all, our requirements may be assessed as per time and changes in the world for sustainability.

We should have open eyes and agile minds to foresee the future. We should be ready to meet changes and challenges in every generation. We may not always get everything suitable and favourable. We have to be ready to bear the fruits of our actions. We may not follow the pick-and-choose policy. Every second is changing. Developments are continuously ongoing processes. Present-day achievements may be futile in the future.

So every new generation gets more opportunities and more problems and has to be ready to rise to the occasion in absolute terms as a versatile organism, to be acceptable everywhere. In short, a multi-purpose robotic life, controlled from a remote without emotions and reactions, will be hard facts to accept. This may be harmful to the humanity and sustainability of our community.

It is the duty of every generation to have coordination between old and new refined moral values as a guide for humanity, culture and peace in life with modernisation. Amendments in thinking as ingredients for developments are continuous processes to be in a race with time. A risk-taking spirit always pays in every generation.

Now, in the modern context, the worst is being noticed within one generation. There are many types of gaps in every front of life full of conflicts. Many types of pressure are mounting in life. That may cause different types of developments and emanate problems in the human kingdom. The world is changing at a faster speed than earlier and affecting the new generation every moment by modifying established concepts.

Developments and changes in human history are the reasons for differences in generations. It will always happen, but the contributions of every generation in human history should not be overlooked.

I need you

I have the desire.
I have dreams.
I have pain.
I have persuasion.

But I have fear –

to lose,
to leave midway,
to challenges,
to weakness,
to strength,
to satisfaction,
to sink,
to crave more,
to yield.

I need you because –

You give courage.
You are my partner.
You are my companion.
You are my friend.
You are my teacher.
You are my guide.
You are my emotions.

I have a body and a soul. I have fed my body to keep it healthy to meet the worldly affairs, but I have forgotten my soul’s need to be near you my almighty. I am in dire need of you. I have faith in you but am about to face failure. Your faith in me may shatter. I know that you have been behind me in every action. So let me not be down. I want your blessings on the advent of my death. I pray you to be my sailor in this world and be my porter to carry me to your world. My rest is there. My peace is there. My life is there. This world is full of uncertainty and negotiation.

Joy of giving

I wanted to show my strength and prove my calibre from the day society started judging me. I wanted to be a successful man to get a place in society. I thought that every successful man had been pursuing money. I had views that money makes the mare go. I had seen that wealthy people had respect and were welcomed everywhere in society without considering their attitudes and behaviour. So, the day I started my carrier in service, I made money my first and last resort to prove to society. I became famous as a money butcher. My house was big with all the possible modern facilities. My family was respected and invited to every function in society. Sincerely, I was busy ploughing the money’s field to multiply in the coffer. I had been a money printer by hook or crook.

I was not alone in that field of greediness. Before me, there were many souls. I was trained by many of them. Everything was well planned and well shared. I was enjoying myself a lot with all comforts missing my future. I could not say whether I was happy or not. I was depressed about money. The more the depression in me the more the urge for robbing the money was in me.

However, I think that the earth may never be deprived of even a single good human who may not change the thought process in favour of humanity. A single incident may change the behaviour and whole life of a human. The day it happens that day is the real beginning of life in a human. That enlightenment is the need in everyone’s life to make heaven on earth. Before that, any human would be having a life a little bit superior to animals.

My life was changed not by a Saint but by an incident of helplessness of a pious soul. Yes, I say him a pious soul because he has sacrificed his last shelter for the cause of others. He had sold his house to satiate my lust and quench the thirst of others in the system to give meaningful life to orphans. The day I got that information I died in me. I wept for my sin. I became a carcass for myself. I found myself nowhere in the universe but that man was twinkling in the sky as a beautiful, attractive star in my dreams. I lost my sleep for nights. The reality was that I remained a beggar with all comforts stored for the coming generation. My life was a curse. So, I decided to be a human and bring life to myself. I searched for that man and he became my path shower in this world. He became my real teacher who taught me the meaning of life. I learnt only one sentence- sacrifice to the sacred life of others without scaring of outcomes because God is there. God shows the path. Whoever treads, becomes a changer. He told me that I have changed because of God. I was owing to the incident that changed me.

I have changed to writing words and making sentences from words to be on the right path to meet a meaningful life for others. Confidence in me is now defining life. I have realised the joy of giving. I am enjoying positive thinking. I am relishing peace in me. Now, I accept you are somewhere my almighty.

Acknowledgement

I hope this mail reaches you well to read me. My mail is blank, you may interpret me. Life is like that. I am not solely myself. Only a few things are mine in your name. I struggle to be noticed in this life because I have been prepared to struggle. The struggle has been my fate and I want to get rid of factors deviating me from drowning in your ocean.

My almighty! I have sent a blank mail because my life has begun like a blank slate or like a white sheet. I was not aware of the circumstances of worldly affairs until I got the sense to be responsive to situations. Since then, on the blank slate of my life, many things have been written. These are controlled by many factors- local, social, regional, traditional, cultural, religious and national etc.

I know that I am a part of this world and the world gives opportunities but with many hidden controlling contents. Whatever I see, are allurements. I am fish in the net. Net is made of controlling factors. These factors are brain teasers. All factors have been written on my slate of life as per time, space, requirements, intensity, expectations, use and outcomes. They have modified me into business material. I have been monetized. I have a fiscal value. I have been made materialistic in this mortal world.

My almighty, though I have developed a professional attitude and body language because of worldly factors yet your natural factors and embedded codes in my physique has affected me also. I have also performed accordingly as and when every factor has influenced me from outside and from within to be as per your will. But I have not trodden paths to be near you because of worldly factors and dissatisfaction in life due to competitive attitudes and habits to grab more to exist and sustain with maximum benefit, though minimum may have been sufficient to survive.

I have missed the bus leading to you my almighty. I have entertained virtual beauty instead of your real beauty coded in nature and humans. Your all factors have activated me in time but I have been camouflaged by need, deed and greed.

According to human-made factors I may be considered successful and suitable for everything. But I find myself on the verge of bankruptcy for thoughts for you almighty. The world thinks that I am independent but I think that it is a relative term and everyone is dependent on many things. Here, in this world, humanity and human rights are the talks of everywhere with controversial discrimination for self-praise. Humans have always missed real facts for existence because of self-centred complexes and every time a new harmful concept is occupying the central stage in the world. Here, respect is paid to the rising Sun, in every concept and It is common everywhere.

I am succumbing to my situation and have sent a blank mail to you with the hope of your light overshadowing worldly factors to be near you. I have been running on a very smooth surface and having falls continuously. I want to be in your shelter. I am a missing drop of your ocean. I want to acknowledge you only. Whatever problems hinder me, you know the solution. I am medium to blame but still, I know that you are doing good for your creatures. So, I do not want to acknowledge the mortal world. I want your love before I start hating myself.

The Heart and I

I have seen physical divisions of land, house, sky and ocean. There may be several reasons for divisions which may be described at length. Even our thoughts have divided all humans. However, I do not want to be physically divided. But I am divided. I am being divided. I have been divided. This is not the end of my divisions. I know that I will be divided many times.

My divisions started from the day I took birth. I was pleasurably divided among many relatives with different names as per relationship. I was not knowing them all except for my relationship with my mother. It was determined by God. She was always special in my life. I was tied to her from within when she was taking a risk of her life only for me. She was my protector when I was outside. She was my unconditional supporter with true guidance without any division.

I do not know the exact time of inception of my divisions in the outer world of unknown people. Perhaps, it started with the journey of my education. I met my mental division as a good student or a bad student in different classes. As I grew older my divisions changed their forms. I was divided by my friends, relatives and my colleagues in the office, etc.

Every time divisions of a friend, foe, well-wisher and obedient, etc. were made after mental exercise but they were given emotional touch to the blood pumping station-the Heart. The heart bore all blame. Though the brain played the game, the heart broke into pieces. Someone cheated but the heart sank or the heart became sad. Even my heart wept. The heart was used as a symbol of life.

All emotional breaks originated from the heart. Specially, all events related to love affairs were earmarked for the heart. It was a pity to my heart. The heart mainly suffered because of the brain. The brain always played the safe game, blaming the heart. Even at working place, I was warned to do the work with a full heart. I could not understand such divisions of full or half heart in working when the brain was involved.

I think, on these concepts, that the heart is very important to think about others, to draw conclusions about others and to decide about taking the job. Reality is the opposite of these blame games because the heart’s functions are influenced by the brain. I may not forget the role of the eye because it indirectly controls the heart through the assistance of the brain and adds fuel to the fire. The eye also plays a safe game and the heart becomes the culprit. The heart is a scapegoat.

Whatever the reason may be, the shape of the heart like a betel’s leaf is very attractive and influences the brain. Such a picture of a heart pierced by an arrow attacks the nerves. I do not want to know whether the heart influences emotions or not, its simplified picture attacks the brain to proceed in any direction. Though the emotional roles of the heart are there yet it is the beauty of life. There should be an emotional day keeping in view the “heart”. The greatness of the heart is praiseworthy and has a place in literature. So sentences intentionally using the heart as a saving tool should be avoided. The sentence “You have no heart”, thrusts all problems of emotions of others on a single person.

Ultimately, I have found that I am not divided by the heart but because of the brain due to which everyone is divided, the world is divided and even God has been divided. Only life is with the heart, controlled by the brain because we are declared brain dead.

Let our hearts be alive to spread love. We should be surrounded by hearty people.

Human-made life cycle- a story

I was indebted to time to face the changes in my life. I was accepting the truth of life that day when my only son was to leave for abroad after attending the last rites of my wife, who was with me for about a golden jubilee period. He knew that I would be alone in that mere house, which was a sweet home because of his mother, so he emphasised me to be careful regarding diet and health. I knew that my bird had flown forever with the memory of the past.

I had a memory of three generations, sufficient to recall – my childhood with grandparents and parents and life with a devoted wife who was in the photo then, leaving me alone. She had broken her promise to be with me forever to take a last breath together. It was not in our control and time again proved to be a strong ruler.

We had been married at the time when the country was taking strides towards growth and development, to be at par with other developed countries. In those days, a boy, either having a government job or remarkable ancestral properties, was considered suitable for marriage. She came into my life because of my job. We played the music of time together and wrote many memorable chapters for ancestors and self. One day, she wrote a beautiful living chapter to add one baby to the new generation, endangering her life, to be complete to pay the debts of our forefathers.

Time was not waiting for anyone or anything. But many things were changing and many old concepts had paved the way for new thinking, controlled by the outcomes of developments. We were also affected. Those villages, where we grew up and saw less selfishness in relationships, appeared to be unattractive, unhealthy, and backwards, as compared to growing cities. We visited our villages on certain occasions to complete rituals but decided to restrict ourselves to cities for the sake of our son, and better education and infrastructure. My parents never lived with us for a long time due to the village’s attraction and we could not leave the city because of our son’s better future. My parents, one by one, left the world forever for the unseen world and our joint family disintegrated into a nuclear family. All brothers and sisters were scattered in the country in pursuit of a better life and the village’s population had declined. We all met occasionally. Our children could not get time to mingle and they became unknown to each other. Our interests, with the passage of time, became detrimental to many established thoughts and we tried to be part of the show business of society.

We were developing. The wheel of progress was moving. The self-contained time passed at the same pace. One day, our son got admission, in the desired subject, to the top-ranking institute in the country. He left the home for his wings to fly. I got a promotion in my job with more responsibilities and less time for my family. The son was away. I was involved mostly both in the office and at home, paying the price of the job responsibilities. My wife, who had her life for us, became alone in that big home, which was her heaven. She became silent. Her smile was occasional. One day, she lost all hopes to be together again when our son declared his decision to go abroad for a lucrative job. We tried to convince him to stay in the country but he became prey to the brain drain.

History repeated the self. Our son had left the country for a good job. I had left my village for the city for a better pasture. We both had the same attitudes but in different ways. We, barring our parents, became part of the crowd. The development and desire to excel consumed relations. The stories were the same but the scene was affected differently. We were in the nearby city to our village and could go regularly to meet our parents but, in our case, that was not possible. That condition affected my wife the most. It was aggravated by my job’s condition. It had not permitted me more time for family, as if the company was fully dependent on me. My wife became very alone, only active to complete her duties for me. She became very silent.

My home had been a hotel for me and she had been a statue. One day, I analysed my financial needs and decided to leave the job for ourselves. But my request was rejected by the authorities. Even my application for leave was not accepted. I could not give more time to her. One day, her condition deteriorated and she was hospitalised for treatment. All symptoms were related to her anxieties. I knew the reason and called the son to be with her for some days. She recovered fast and I got my wife back in normal condition.

I asked, rather than requesting my son to continue here forever, for his mother. But he logically and diplomatically expressed his helplessness. Once again, history repeated itself when he told that we settled in the city due to a lack of basic needs related to infrastructure. That was also applicable in his case on a larger scale. He recalled the memory of difficulties in getting the work done in various offices. There were no facilities as compared to his present country of stay. I smiled to know the change in attitude. He said that he had seen venomous political debates on channels of TV, wherein everyone tried to be right, dividing the society on various grounds and having strategies for the growth of the country. Most of them had changed political parties many times. Their principles had changed for getting tickets in elections. People did not have traffic sense and respect for children and aged persons on the roads. Ease of living norms was not present even after so many years.

I could not admire his analysis. I guessed that his stay was not possible because of his experiences in a new country. I took a chance to convince him. I recalled the thinking and analytical potentials of our ancestors and valuable literature, full of findings, related to all walks of life from nature to the universe to the almighty, given to the world. Those were useful in the present day also. Because of those abilities, we had the qualities to excel. When opportunities knocked, we grabbed them but other countries were using us in the form of a brain drain, alluring us, as the money mattered and facilities attracted. We had many things to give to the world as a family. Everyone is looking towards our country for peace and cultural richness. You might be missing there in a new country.

I accepted his denial to continue as the fate and destiny of my wife. We, as parents, blessed him with a bright life ahead. I had seen waves deep in the eyes of my wife while kissing the head of her son. She missed him a lot. I took voluntary retirement after continuous persuasion to look after her. We had a memory as treasures.

The success of our son in life had bought pleasure and recognition in society. We were judged as the best parents. We had seen proud moments and now we were facing problems. After a few years, my wife left me alone. She, at the last time, was seeing towards the door, waiting for her son. Her son came to attend her last rites, but he was worried about me. I was thankful for his concern but he could not continue in this country. I was not having hope anymore.

After his departure, I enquired in many institutions and old age homes about my stay for the rest of my life. I realised, for the first time, the plights of old people in society. In our youth phase, I gave priority to hay days and forgot about doomsday. I was alone with many problems. Developments took their toll. I felt that life was not financial management controlled by fund managers but it needed a highly devoted service manager. Money in the bank’s account chided me. I assumed the conditions of my parents, the last time when I had become a parent.

Age is a number

It is the nature of humans to reiterate the common favourite lines to be said on a particular occasion. It has to be, as we wish someone on a birthday, new year and anniversary etc. Those lines are used with somewhat changes, having the same fervour.

I have always heard many beautiful lines on such dates, in my case, also but one line being told at the time of retirement from service, has attracted me the most. The line always being told during wishing for happy retirement life is that – age is a number. Though this notion instils positivity yet we forget that facts reflect their shadow. The fact is that with every day, a number of changes in the present life and body, along with mental health occur. Such changes have effects. Otherwise, the retirement age should have been different or something else.

It is true regarding age, but we should remember that every number has a face value and has increasing or decreasing value relations with preceding and succeeding numbers. Likewise, the number in age has only increasing value in the preceding year in terms of experience, expectations, aspirations and responsibilities etc. The time, for self, decreases and attention towards a name or position, in most cases, gets priority over the future to be realities.

This phase of service life is getting professional advice in the present situation when the longevity of both female and male have increased because of congenial developments. The retiring persons are being imparted knowledge on savings, investments, expenditures and careful handling of lucrative offers in the digital world. These are important, because of limited sources of income and changing social and personal relations.

The most important requirement for the earlier active person after retirement is the engagement for the routine period earmarked for official engagement in service. There becomes a sudden vacuum.
They are considered exhausted.

Many suggestions for their engagement may be given but dignity, flexibility in duty hours and respect etc. should be taken care of. Most of the time, they are emotionally blackmailed and become prey to cheating people in the name of engagements. We forget that they are treasures of experience and are ready to share them. They may easily be ready to return to the society to which they feel indebted. A fully respectful system, for engaging them, is needed at the time.

They need care with the passage of time also. They should not be left unattended to feel neglected. Their healths deteriorate faster because of this. They become more dependent as the number in age increases. They become helpless and take shelter in old age homes, because of family problems or otherwise.

There is no controversy in considering that age is a number but this appears to be true in the case of such professions where separations are to be decided by self. In every profession, whatever engagement, separation has to happen and age has to reflect its effects.

Age is a number for counting. It has demands also. But positivity is there. Everyone should have it, as age has many things in store to return.

We should not forget that God is there and love is life. We should not forget that we are successors also, so we have ideas about age.


HAPPY NEW YEAR 2023 TO ALL MY FRIENDS

FACTS

Everyone knows that status is not permanent. Who will not accept that position or condition may not change? It is also known that time is not multiplied. All such facts we know but in reality, we forget them and repent later on facing the situation. The almighty evolved the life in animal kingdom up to the highest level of humans with developed brains but without languages. The only common language controlled by nerves, continuing in humans everywhere, might be then in existence. All good or bad happenings and habits of the present day are the results of the experiences and needs of humans, faced in course of growth and development.

Human civilization has seen changes from the stone age to the present age of scientific achievements. The changes have been witnessed from mega-sized machines to smaller to nono machines. Developments have been made in many fields. Humans have started exploring planetary bodies and the universe. The weapons have changed from stones of the stone age to modern-day sophisticated weapons. Since then, enemies have changed from visible to invisible types affecting everyone. Most of the changes have been recorded in black and white.

It is also a fact that every new generation has the opportunity to reap the benefits of earlier generations’ developments and achievements without experiencing the efforts made and challenges faced.

One of the facts, I think to be true is the controlling age factor and old age in humans are meant for reviewing life and educating the present generation from their experiences. This age of mine has met a minimum of three generations.
We have seen the maximum changes in social bindings from the combined family to the nuclear family, from cooperative to self-centred attitudes- a deviation from share and care culture.

I remember one incident when I had joined service in a government office where I met the father of my friend. He told about his emotions after receiving his first salary in service. He had spent his salary on the purchase of clothing for his parents, grandparents, brothers and sisters. I was surprised to note his feelings because I had sent only half of my salary to my parents. My grandfather had given all his income to his mother every month.

Now, I have grown older and am on the verge of retirement and the new generation is joining the office. I have been surprised to note that most of them purchased costly cell phones from their first salary to show their status without considering the situation of families and moral duties. The new generation has seen from copy to computer and from pen to e-system directly in one go. The earlier employees used to go to their parental houses to reside after retirement. Later, comfort played a role and settlement started in cities. Now the service opportunities are centred in a few places and the concept of ancestor houses is vanishing fast for a new generation.

These changes have mostly affected the old aged persons who have time but no one to share their experiences and expertise of life. When I was in my fifties, I was relaxed, as my father was my advisor and guide for all problems and my mother’s affectionate touch and love were my heavens. I always remained a child for them and enjoyed their experiences. One thing I remember is that in their last days they were like children having short memories and stubborn habits. I became their guardian for them till their departure from this opportunistic world. Now the question is what about me? I have a vacuum. I know the silent, unknown and sad departure of one of my friends because his sons were unable to come to meet him in his dying days. His whole life he had been praising the achievements of his sons for his status in society. We could know about his departure when his body was lying in a closed house, crying for disposal with a foul smell. All statuses proved futile last time without any social security. I am also sailing in the same boat and am worried. I think local common residences or well-managed old age homes may be promising for all aged persons.

Now, the effects of changes are as such that the new generation is not having time for themselves or family. This generation is getting treated as machines in professional life. This generation is mainly active on social media for information, time-consuming likes or comments and relationships after working time. The relations are nearer at the fingertips of gadgets but are emotionally far away due to distress and competition to prove to be excellent and exceptional. Life has been marketed to introduce the best product leading to psychological problems. Their slogan is that this life will not be met a second time, so enjoy it. There should be a new methodology to work free of distress to keep humanity alive. This generation is very sensitive and well-equipped to have an identity.

All problems have not gathered in one generation. We are expecting too much from the new generation without a proper education system and syllabus etc. We are harping on the same string for a long time. We need introspection for the new generation which is more career oriented and wants to be independent of duties towards older generations for lack of ” me time ” and costly lifestyle. We may not make every new generation scapegoat for our faults in teaching them moral, social and spiritual, etc. values and the importance of united families. It is our responsibility for the new world given to the new generation.

Besides, I have seen many changes after the economic revolution, in this one life. We have done more harm than good to ourselves through uncontrolled developments for supremacy. We have maximum adversely affected environments both surrounding and natural. We have seen the extinction of many species of birds and animals. Effects on seasons are also causing more harm to humans through erratic behaviours.

Nothing is permanent. Nature has been revealed through evolution and selection. The fittest always survive. It is the open secret of nature. It is now our turn to cautiously evaluate the progress-related activities for humans’ comfortable existence and sustainability. Otherwise, transformations may be heinous to civilization.

We should observe that nature has distributed all her resources throughout the globe, perhaps with the definite intention of evolving cooperation among all humans, besides geographical differences, for survival and existence. We are witnessing, after the division of land and ocean as properties of different nations that no nation is self-sufficient to survive alone and needs cooperation. We should have progressive scientific thinking to excel.

We have changed. We are changing at our cost.

Checking

As we grow, the tendency of checking develops, and as such that it becomes a habit in long run. It starts from a safety point of view and finally becomes unchecked, in nature. In childhood, everything remains good until a child gains strength and starts using two legs to take the first step to tread the world. The child becomes like a vehicle without brakes. The first step is always encouraged and admired by all. But the moment a child starts using the brain to think and expresses curiosity to learn and touch because everything is new, unknown and amazing, the checking starts. For a child, rope and snake are the same. A child gets attention and parents become over-conscious about the security of the child and the loss of valuable materials. It is ensured that all things should be beyond the reach of a child. Though the intention is very clear that the child may touch, engulf, get hurt and damage things, attention gets top priority. But this habit of continuous checking has psychological effects on a child in the overall development and gives mostly negative results. The situation becomes worse when a caretaker is posted for this purpose for a child because the effects of checking may be multiplied as the appointee may become extra conscious of the secured self’s service. Ultimately, because of this, the interest of the child is not properly developed. We should enjoy childhood by reasonably checking, what we don’t remember due to forgetting. They should be treated friendly to prepare for the changing world.

Children are always children. They need directions and channelling of vibrant energy along with checking for their benefits. Let them be children till they start learning worldly vices.

Such encounter with checking in the name of prohibitions from the beginning of life in day-to-day work becomes a habit when we grow. We face in life more checkings than permissions in the name of society, moralities, discipline, religions, status and culture etc.

The method of checkings may be different at different places but the aim is the same everywhere- safety, security discipline and good governance etc. – to live and let live. In checking, the law of the land is supreme and for that different departments with defined responsibilities in government offices, legal courts and vigilant agencies are established.

Apart from these, there is moral policing of social contractors, checking social life and morality, according to age-old traditions. They go to any extent in the name of cleaning society. One step ahead, religious preachers and teachers impose their checking norms on the respective communities to strictly stick to laid down rules without fail. They have their concepts developed and concluded from the prevailing thoughts of religion to hold supremacy in society. They may define every single word of religious books to check and inculcate the community. They may go to any extent in this regard, in the name of competition with each other to influence and make new followers to satiate their thirst to impose restrictions on all, in the name of heaven and God.

Sometimes, these moral policing and religious thinking are playing roles of checking above the law of land and are used by political parties to grab the seats to form a government. They add fuel to the fire. This type of stringent checking is a serious threat to unforeseen consequences in future, where self will be above nation and law.

We may not reach on conclusion in the name of liberty that checking should not be there at any stage. But we should understand that we are not wild animals and the law of the jungle ( forest ) may not be allowed in civil society. Otherwise, life will be hell and we will be worse than animals with developed brains. Civic sense should prevail.

Checking is the essential devil for certain essential requirements for all without distinction, based on age, caste, creed, community and religion. Hardliners must be checked at every stage and place for the sake of humanity, social justice, peace, growth and security of the nation.

Checking pervert thinking and teaching must draw attention before they pollute the whole system. We should check before declaring OK for all concerned.

CHILD IN SEPARATION- A Story

Am I a broken soul? Do I have an entity? Why do you not break the news related to me, as breaking news, showing for many hours on your TV channels?

Such were dialogues in a stage drama in which a boy was pleading before the judge on the fates of children facing the separation of parents because of the so-called heinous divorce. It was that part of the drama in which the boy was to choose one between his father and mother to live with after their separation.

The boy was fully prepared to open his plights of life. These were social and psychological problems. The boy told with full emphasis, ” he is a living gender in the world of so-called civilized society. He should not be treated as a commodity meant for sale to one person only. He has a soul that is on the earth because of two souls who have decided to increase their family – my parents. I am not ready to miss any of them naturally or unnaturally. My mother is like earth to me, and my father is like a mentor to show me the world. I want both of them for my growth, development and sustainability.

I am a witness to the heydays of my parents’ lives. I may not accept them separately because I am not a culprit, if their attitudes change toward each other later in life, I should not bear the brunt. As a child, I have my dreams to be in life. My future is related to both of them. I need their guidance, support, and togetherness for every moment.

My parents are the judges who have decided to bring me to life. Now, I should be given the right to decide their separation which I never accept because of their changing attitudes. I do not want to be like a helpless and hopeless boy who does wait for a predetermined particular day and time to meet one of the parents having a tag of divorcees. I do not want the part-time love of my parents. I do not want to be seen in society with pity. I know a few friends facing such situations. They are having many problems, especially psychological ones dealing with day-to-day work. Even classmates and friends change their views towards a child like me while talking. I do not want to be distinguished like that. If the father or mother remarriages, the condition of the stepchild becomes more pathetic. The condition of a girl child, who is supposed to have lion’s share to carry forward all the stigma of family, religion, traditions and society, is worse in this situation.

In my view, no parents should be allowed, in any condition, to be separated if they bear a child. Their relationship should not affect the future of a child. I know nowadays, due to social changes and so many opportunities present, parenting is also changing but the ultimate sufferers are children. These are taking a toll on children. Such persons who want to marry and also want to be parents in the future are supposed to be mature enough to know their responsibilities in life. A child who witnesses their affection and well-thought approach should not be a victim in the future, in their lives, if any kind of problem arises. I am not a child of an animal. I need to fight differently for existence in the changing world and I have to learn from and live with my parents.

Our society does not have any system to tackle such children. A child like me is also the future of a nation. I want to be a doctor. Who will bear my expenses for the same? A projected cost of studies, in case of no solution and ultimate separation, should be deposited or otherwise in the direction of a respectable Court, with direction to the automatic, timely release of funds to the concerned child like me. A third party under the full supervision of the court should be given the onus to look after such children. I do not want to go to any orphanage or shelter homes where situations may not be congenial, as I have read about many unhappy incidents in such dwellings in news. I am supposed to be the best but I do not want to be the definite worst.

I should not be prey to the unnoticed reasons that culminate later in the married life of my parents. This is not the judgement that is on my price. This is a kind of death warrant for my life in the world that judges everyone on its standard. No child is ready for this. I may not talk to God but I may tell my mind here in this world. I am not the only sufferer; society is to suffer also and bear the consequences of this human-made crime. Psychological and social studies, on children like me, are of no use if not giving lessons or redressal to stop such venomous acts.

Finally, I think that this story may be repeated in a second marriage. Then again, a child may face the same situation.

At last, I want to live with both of them so my parents should be punished to live together forever in life or till I become able and become independent. I am positive in the hope that I will be the reason for the revival of their togetherness.”

The message in the drama was very clear to settle the differences in married life in view of the future of children.

Hasty decisions should be avoided and separation should be last to come to mind with the closure of all options to be under one roof. Moreover, decisions at every step in life, mainly after marriage, should be well thought out, discussed and analyzed to avoid future problems, especially those related to children. The future of a child should be ensured until he or she becomes independent.