Me of Mine

I have “me” in myself. This me of mine is the root cause of all types of greed, distress and diseases.

When I was an infant, I was with my mother only. I always wanted to be with her only. She was my world for everything.
She was my life jacket in the world of problems from my first day on this earth. I learned to swim in this oceanic world under the supervision of my mother. She was my heaven. I was only comfortable with her.

   When first time I was sent to school I felt alone. My troubles started with learning the first letter of the alphabet in my mother tongue. I started facing worldly vices. My mother made me acquainted with such affairs and gave me lessons to cope with them.

One day my mother left me alone in this world for her invisible journey to another world. I became an orphan and easy prey to all nuances of society. I turned from good to bad and from bad to worse and worst.  I forgot to control my tongue and master the time for the sake of me. I could not behave like a sieve to be like a sage.

I was always right on the wrong side. Earlier, I had searched for myself in my mother but now without my mother, I had been a demon with harming tendencies. All earlier teachings were futile. I changed as per my needs and became more selfish. I had lost myself in me.

My love for myself had been a curse later in life. I wanted to regret and regain my childhood notions and thoughts. I wanted my mother to be with me again. But this was not possible.

I did not know the history of souls. My mind had a plethora of thoughts like waves in the ocean. I wanted to use my waves for me and for peace in life. I had recalled my mother’s teaching, –  “the new path starts from where you become helpless and confused about life and devote yourself to the almighty. Then he takes care.”

I have surrendered to almighty for his shelter. This time my me is not for myself but for selflessness. My me has submerged into almighty. I have restricted myself to a minimum for living and requirements. My thoughts start with him and end with him – the almighty. My me is for your cause.

Now I am yours. Sorry, I have never asked – ” how are you “? I am pity on myself for losing you. My repentance may please be accepted for me.   

Honeymoon

Ouch, you have orchestral touch. I have heavenly pleasure.
No words, no sound, let the music of silence spread.
No boundaries, no pointed indication, let liberty be enjoyed.
No enticing, no sensation, let me be imbibed.
No memory, no repentance, let me be lost.
No more chance, no revival, let me be forgotten.
No objection, no-obligation, let me be admissible.
No permission, no hesitation, let only be submission.
No feeling, no thrilling, let only be healing.
No sorrow, no joy, let only be happy tears.
No summer, no winter, let only be spring.
No solace, no arrogance, let me be in an embrace.

My almighty, I want to mingle with you to forget my entity. You are the reason for my separation from you. I want to restrict to you but you are the reason for my – me, mine, myself – deviation from you. I want to be your object and you are the reason for my devotion. I want to leave but you are the reason for my continuity.

As I am part of you, I have the remorseless right to have demand to be with you. I have many wishes to be fulfilled by you. I have seen your natural world, turning into an artificial trench, holding supremacy on the pretension of your intentions. You are under unprecedented questions by self-declared Gods on earth. Everything is confusing. You have been interpreted on earth, according to the will of the mighty one. You are the virtual means of threatening, in the name of the creator.

Abstaining from all confusion, I want to be with you, on your honeymoon forever. No relation, no self but the spiritual honeymoon. You dive deep into me for spiritual ecstasy. You see and I will sink. Your breathing is my sensation. Your indication is my message. Your grace is my treasure. Your target is my surrender. All celestial bodies will be our homes. We will fly on clouds with windy wings. Sun and Moon will be our path showers. Stars will illuminate our nights.

You are my limit. All wishes start with you and end with you. Let me revolve around you. I want to be no more.  

The Great ” ZERO “

The beginning and end of ” zero ” may not be known. For anyone, zero is meaningless and has no value. It is used to express the foolishness of someone also. But this zero is very important in the calculation in this materialistic world.  When it is placed after any number, it changes nothing into something. It changes the place value. A number of zeros, together, become stronger to add value. Though the value of zero is none, its circular shape has meaning. Its size has no limit. The finding of the circular wheel, much before the concept of zero came, matched zero’s shape and speeded the development of civilisation from primitive to modern and technologically advanced societies. We may notice the effective importance of the shape of zero that most of the moving or revolving things are circular and follow a circular path.

Zero echoes that nothing is also important and contributes to making the identity of self and others meaningful. We may find such special issues in life especially related to spirituality and society. Most intelligent people have biased notions toward persons of less importance. However, many persons like zero are important to a leading personality and they become useful to someone. They make difference as a part of the crowd. Their potentialities may be channelized to get fruitful results. Sometimes, they are misused or mishandled for self-interests by mischievous elements. They need utmost attention for a proper respectable share in society. The feeling that I am the best should not always neglect the importance of zero in society. This attitude may disintegrate the social structure. We should have zero tolerance for such attitudes. Individuality is very important.

Spiritually, zero is like a sage who gives meaning to other’s life and pervades sanctity. All desires merge into one eternity to be zero in existence. Ultimately, zero encircles all to be within the limit. This has implicit philosophy to live and let live. Zero is always persistent. We originate from zero. We have to merge into zero.

Zero is a force giving meaning everywhere as per need. It may define others, keeping self unaffected. Zero is the root of all activities and thoughts. 

S E L F – Respect

It is said that mother, motherland and mother tongue should always be respected without sarcastic remarks. Mother’s place is greater than heaven. Likewise, motherland and mother tongue have a place in everyone’s heart. Even distance is not the barrier and the heart always throbs for them. While the mother is an individual’s concern, motherland and mother tongue are binding factors among all. In present days of need-based migration, these are the identities of a person. Everyone should respect these three gems of life for self and others because without self-respect no one may discover self. The moment we forget them our slavery starts. Others start ruling over and controlling as per their needs. All freedom movements, the world over, are for restoring self-respect. Our nationality may change but not our identity.

Self-respect is armour and should be in every place, whether at home or working places. If any relative at home or boss at working places disrespects beyond limit then a reaction is expected from everyone. No compromise is appreciable because self-respect is extremely self.

In this materialistic world, bosses are always ready to fire their employees who have devoted their lives to them. Students are disrespecting their teachers for small causes. Juniors are ready to assess the utilities of seniors who have trained them. All these happenings are the indicators of deterioration, biases and self-interest in the working atmosphere. It is better to fight for self-respect at such places or may leave these places in self-respect and see another pasture after giving a befitting reply.

In this world, we are boasting of a developed civilization but women are the most suffering class concerning self-respect. They are taken for granted as easy prey because in the name of modesty they are advised to keep silent for themselves and family. They are lesser paid at working places as compared to males for the same work. They are considered as weak and meant for certain works only, specifically for household workers in these so-called developed societies. But it is a matter of solace that education and self-reliance have motivated them and they are taking a stand against malpractices. Their “Me too” movements are exposing the reality of many famous personalities in the societies. This is a new beacon of hope. They have to go miles before self-respect is ensured everywhere. They deserve respect as a mother, sisters, wives and daughters, in all other assigned roles.

We have many complexes in mind for nothing. We deliver sermons with good words advocating equality for all before almighty but it is not true in practice. Our behaviours distinguish. We have grudges for the complexion of black and white, for the superiority of races, etc. We follow a double standard for our selfishness to dominate. Even children are not spared and they are facing abuse at home and in schools etc. We treat them as the hope of God but reality matters the most. It is not praised worthy.

One day situation may change with consciousness and spirit of self-respect. If we go through the two epics of the Sanatan religion – the Ramayan and the Mahabharat we may find that in every Era self-respect mattered. Wars were fought and kingdoms were devastated. Moreover, it is found that in “kali yuga” ( as per the  Sanatan religion it is the fourth stage of the world. It is the age of misery, quarrel, moral decay and hypocrisy ) for saving self-respect, ladies practised Jauhar- a practice of mass self-immolation for honouring modesty and chastity from invaders.

Disrespect of one’s self-respect is an unpardonable crime and needs stern dealing. Before that, one who does not fight for self-respect is like a stone. We should not forget that VIPs are made by us but everyone takes birth with self-respect given by the almighty. We should bend our heads before God and not before so-called perishable VIPs. No one may be a destiny decider. We are not here to satiate the ego of someone.

Self-respect is an individual’s concern but the attitudes of society need complete modification. We should understand the meaning of hidden thoughts in rituals where persons of every profession are involved and deserve respect. Even grass and thorns are used respectfully in puja ( worship) in the Sanatan religion. This is the message of our rituals that nature has also self-respect and nothing is useless. We should not forget that nature may snatch self-respect through many means.   

Engagement

We have divided day and night into twenty-four hours. We have most of these times for ourselves. Even then, we think of some engagement for the rest of the time we feel free. The rest of the time is a main controlling enzyme of the quality of life we lead. This controls the “me” time of an individual for the whole life.

Everyone has complete time for themselves in childhood. That time decreases as the age grows but twenty-four hours of day and night remain static. Everyone has to adjust the life every day within this stipulated duration. The making or devastation of life depends on self-controlled activities. So the activities should be well planned considering all  prospects. If they are governed by moral values, the future of individuals and society, in turn, will be progressive, free of all sorts of shortcomings. Otherwise, the reverse is also possible in life, due to immoral practices.

The moment selfishness overshadows all positive norms, the trouble starts, greediness occupies front seats and life becomes hell. These types of thoughts ruin the present and future of family and society.

The past of life is mainly influenced by the behaviours and attitudes of parents, friends and relatives. The best of those should be taken for building the life in the present. This legacy is passed on like that from generation to generation. The dominance of positivity in actions, emotions and attitudes etc. makes life heaven and peace prevails in the surrounding. The godly environment inculcates thoughts – live and let live- everywhere. There may always be additions in life. This type of engagement we may get from religious thoughts.

Engagements should be both professional and personal. Personal engagements, controlled by mental ability and maturity, give direction to all types of engagements. Professional engagements give means to survive and do good for society. Purposeful life depends on both in the changing world.

Sitting idle without ideals is harmful. Engagement is a must. Otherwise, life will be like stagnant water. Stagnant water becomes rotten. Thinking, for the betterment of humanity, should be a continuous process with respect to developments. Short goals pave the path for large goals. These are steps on a stair to reach on top to see the world and give return gifts to the society which has given opportunities and meaning to one’s life.
What the world, we find at present, is built by deep thoughts of ancestors in a progressive manner. We should have similar types of thoughts for engagements.

The negative thoughts may ruin self-life. Selfless is always better than selfishness. The present is the gate to the future. The present demands utmost utilization. What we sow so we reap. The fruit of action may not be personal.

Engagement is extremely private and a privilege of every individual. But its effects may be long-lasting. We may take a few qualities from nature’s creatures for timely engagements. Engagement is the necessary content of life. We should be engaged both mentally and professionally. Engagements as per interests fetch pleasures and satisfactions. The best engagement is forgetting self for others’ welfare. Even God loves it as the first step towards salvation.

Return

I think that a suitable word denoting completion of a cycle is ” Return “. In a wheel, a point returns to its previous location in completion of one circle but it goes ahead and reaches to the location by repeating the cycle. This is applicable to all. No one can move without completing a cycle.

Nature is an open book, where a number of cycles are running continuously maintaining close coordination with each other. There are cycles in air, in the sea and within the earth. If any disturbance is detected its effects may be hazardous. The important seasonal cycle- summer – rain and winter, is well known on the earth. There may be a deviation in other parts of the earth. This cycle mainly depends on the temperature, cloud and wind. The wind cycle depends on the temperature, to carry clouds which depends on low-pressure zones to discharge water as rain. This season’s cycle along with another water’s cycle is the life of nature. Nature maintains her existence with the temperature and the water.

Every creature depends mainly on these cycles. Besides, there are the food cycle, growth cycle and many more essential cycles in nature. But the water cycle is important for sustainability. Nature frugally uses this valuable gift. Nature behaves like a miser. She uses water for creatures, stores water on the  earth for use and sends back surplus water to the ocean for maintaining the continuity of the cycle. Nature, for this, has a unique transportation system of rivers, leading to the ocean.

Nature is very kind. Nature is very cruel also. At last, nature takes all things back from her dwellers, whatever she releases from her warehouses. All creatures from  invisible to visible take essential items from the earth and surroundings for origin, growth and performing worldly duties. Nature very kindly support a life and supply essentials for sustainability. But she has defined return policies for her treasury. When a living thing becomes nonliving, her systems and agents get activated automatically at the proper time to take back all essentials used. The body decays and becomes useful for others. These cycles run continuously in nature.

Humans are also part of nature’s cycles. But they have a brain. They think, because of this, they have interfering qualities through thoughts, behaviours, emotions and greedy attitudes. They do not have their cycles to challenge nature but they have a sequence of karma (actions ) followed by fruits (results). In this sequence, karma controls the type of fruit and fruit may control the further course of actions followed by results to carry on the sequence which controls the life in the human kingdom. Karma is mainly controlled by attitudes, behaviours, surroundings and emotions. But the greed of humans plays a vital role in deciding the path of karma. Though humans, based on experience in the past, may anticipate the relationship between karma and results, yet they are disturbing nature. Humans are fully dependent on nature from day one to the last day of their lives. But in the name of sustainability, they are taking more from nature than they can return. Most of the resources are non-renewable and non- replenishing.

Nature has suffered from humans to the extent that her seasonal cycle and the water cycle have been disturbed the most. The results of karma are backfiring on humans and their existence is in danger. Nature is taking its course to sustain and is giving a warning to humans to be careful to change their thinking before it is too late.

We have potential beyond imagination. We have to rise to the occasion to limit our needs to a minimum. Otherwise, the fruits of actions will be annihilating. We may not save ourselves with all technological advancements. The return may be to the stone age but on the wheel of destruction what we are witnessing in the form of different types of wars between countries in the world. We are forgetting that our cycle is completed from the almighty to the almighty via natural duties with the assistance of nature made by the almighty. We are so intelligent that in this cycle of life we always fight for the existence of the almighty and we fight for my God and your God but we forget to define a human and humanity. We should celebrate a human day also for our sake. We should also think about fixing a day in the name of God, in a year, to remember that we are sons and daughters of only one God.

Gratitude

I am not creator. I am contributor. I have always expressed my gratitude in my applications, written to the appealing authorities with selfish professionalism to extract favour from their arrogance, in  holding a God like position, in their senses.
Professionalism is always for the self first. I have done all this for my self growth and for satisfying my ego. My ego has been a driving force in my professional journey. It has shown me both short and long paths to tread in this journey of life. I opted the path as per situational demand.

I think my sense of gratitude was not by heart, so it never gave me happiness after any achievement. I was deceiting my self. I had many companions in my professional journey, posing as my well wishers in front of me. But they used to dig  my grave behind me for their egos. That was also a way of showing gratitude.

So, I understand that gratitude is a vehicle that carries everyone’s ego forward. The result of ego may be in positive or in negative, affecting the progress of units of executions. Rest lies in the hand of destiny.
Destiny is torch bearer. It is  controlled  by almighty. It is said that one can change destiny but that is also in control of almighty.

So, I think my sincere gratitude is to almighty. In my journey of life, I show my heartiest gratitude to all who have brought smile and happiness for me without expecting anything. My sincere gratitude in reality is for those who gave me experiences through their behaviours and attitudes. They have prepared me for odds and made me bold for existence. I reveal my gratitude and indebtedness to nature who has taken care of everything for my life. I have no sense of gratitude for my parents because I may not be selfish for them. My all thoughts end with them. They are my beginning and they are my termination. The lap wherein I got love,  peace, security, safety and learned lessons of life has no suitable word in any language of the world for measuring and expressing gratitude. I may reserve my will above all for them. I always miss them. My mother is above all and her lap is above God’s heaven. So, all my gratitude are to everyone visible or invisible in life’s journey.
May I give gratitude to me for always being me. I do am, my destiny. My gratitude is to destiny.

POOR- The bread givers

I am not poor. I am not only born with a belly and a mouth but also have two hands. Like every one, I took birth as raw but my parents were categorised as the  poor by human’s  prescribed standards. Since childhood, it appeared that I was special for specific purpose, as if, God had sent me for already continued assignments and I had to bear them as destiny. I was provided opportunities for own developments, on so determined  equal basis, in the name of education and health etc. with separate bases, as securities, for my category, according to my affordability and status.

When I grew with my situational fate, my views analysed that great God never differentiated and provided everyone with same biological qualities but the existing system on earth was human made in the name of management and necessities.

I think poor have a very traditional approach towards life but knowledge on the poor’s history is immaterial. Solutions are expected only from controllers, as provider. Now, I find that all needy are kind of poor and actual poor by categorisation are the foundation of all types of growth. They are the means of employments and engagements. Everyone may agree in principle that  the poverty is a curse, but I  think, it is a boon for many in the society. When I analyse, I observe that poor are bread and butter givers to many like writers, artists, painters, film makers, NGOs and government employees etc. Everyone of each category gives attention to the poor in her or his specialsation to expose plights and earns for own survival. Every government tries to eradicate poverty through schemes but the poorness is still continuing.

The poverty is a fire that is destined to give energy to all activities. Perhaps, not a single work can be done without the poor. We are paid for work but only sufficient for survival to carry on the livelihoods.

The  Poor are letters to start. The Poor are words for depictions. The Poor are sentences for complete meaning. The  Poor are necessities. All government’s schemes may not show the end of poverty because the implementors are very poor and they need more attentions. They always have their first bites from our dishes. So, our continuation appears to be permanent. We may be easily recognised every where without difficulty because of psychological reasons of our surrendering to the situations. We have no honor or place in society and  we are never treated to be honest. These are well accepted thoughts. The Poor are something for every section of society.

Being poor, I am proud that my fate enables me  to make fate of others. My share is with everyone as reminder for caring me. I expect that one day my complete share will reach to me before my departure from this opportunistic world. I want to be real rich person, complete in all respects without any camouflage. May every poor be like that free of small, dirty, poorly drained and stingy huts or small rooms with dilapidated walls in a distant  side of a city or town, as neglected habitats, contributing in richness of others.

Daughter

She comes,
She smiles,
She touches,
She holds,
She hugs,
She cares,
She gives me a name.

She is my friend,
She is my life,
She is my destiny,
She is my love,
She is my flower,
She is my fragrance,
She is my light,
She is my twittering bird,
She is my face ,
She has given me purpose,
She is my blessing,
She is my daughter.

Her future is my future,
Her sound is my path,
Her journey is my journey,
Her smile is my treasure.

She has to fly,
I have to give her wings.
She has to be traditional,
I have to give her rituals,
She has to be for sure,
I have to give her opportunities.
She has her own identity,
I have to give her strength.
She is a gender,
I have to make her perfect.
She is the maker,
I have to give her time.

She should be self,
She should be a book,
She should be easy,
She should be tough,
She should be water,
She should be wind,
She should be earth,
She should be open,
She should be closed,
She should be medium,
She should be maker,
She should be power,
She should be inspiration.

She should be for others,
She should be creative,
She should be for nature,
But she should be for her own.

My shadow

Because of me and myself, I have a shadow. My shadow is best companion of me in day or in light. It is black and unseen in dark. I have virtual shadow in night. My shadow increases and decreases in size owing to source and distance of light. I may have many shadows as per number of sources of light. I am in grief that I may not have shadow in dark and in the sky. I may not give colours to it.

My shadow helps me alone in deciding many things. I get knowledge of directions and probable distance of source of light except the distance of Sun. My shadow always has its identity, except one time it has lost its identity informing me because shadow- shadow interaction began for third shadow. Now my shadow is not in my control.


My shadow has no life but has the philosophy of life. Outer shadow needs outer source of light but inner shadow needs own enlightenment because problems of world are due to internal shadow. Our attitudes, thoughts, actions and interactions are controlled by this shadow. My physical shadow shows directions and distance but inner shadow makes blind and covers self consciousness. Inner shadow is limited to self body, but affects the surroundings. I have to search peace. I have to spare me from immoral things. I have to be immortal from mortality. I have to be selfless. I have to be of use for others. I have to leave arrogance. I have to search and follow truth. I have to overcome my inner shadow for all these changes. Every thing is within.

My outer shadow will not be with me forever but inner shadow may make my life heavenly on earth. I have to meet a path shower guru ( teacher ). I have to do noble deeds. I have to be me first, for others.

I read books. I got confused. Every book had its limitation. No book was complete in itself. Some books were for allurements. Some books were self praising.

Ultimately, I have a thought and concluded as under – that worldly duties should be performed in pious manner without harming anyone. I can change the world but I have to change first. Smiling face, soft words, and ready to help attitudes give peace and make life easy. Only deed should speak. Name should be used for identity and not for boasting. No one will carry any thing at the time of departure from this world. So attitude of hoarding should be beyond mind. Opportunities should be shared and needy should get first preference. Everyone should respect each other and should behave as servant, not the master.

All these are possible but inner shadow should be in control through fact finding and removing all greedy attitudes. One should have faith in self. Nothing is mine forever. Everyone is important. Everyone is a tourist in the world and is on tourist visa for  certain  duration. If I help someone, it means I have helped myself. Such attitudes  may be sufficient for control of inner shadow’s hunger. I am ready to bear the fruits of my deeds. I have hope. I have to Judge myself, other may not truly judge me. May God bless me and my soul rest in peace on earth and in heaven.

I know that God is great but I have to give him the chance.