CONFUSION-The story for beginning

It was a valid question. How long may we go together? She asked. For me ” Why ” was involved in this doubt. So I wanted to know the reason for that question before the beginning of an important phase of life.
She replied that the world is changing fast, so we may also change with the world in time. I smiled to know more. She went on to speak on many examples of having negative impacts and broken lives, full of tears. I agreed for a little but tried to convince her to explore deeply as a social and personal researcher.

We have many types of lives, in one life given and fully controlled by the almighty for duration and extent. In that one life, social responsibilities give this opportunity where two are involved to grow together as one entity to procreate. This life is the main centre surrounded by many types of activities and lives expecting responsibilities. This is a fact where competition should not come in mind to dominate over each other. We should not compromise but cooperate and trust each other for the best results. The natural duties assigned to different genders may not be changed. One may assist or cooperate in such functions.

We are social animals, not like wild animals where most of the duties are responsibilities of females, especially towards children. But such is not the case with us, human beings, as we have developed brains to excel. The moment a relation is given a name, the identity changes with certain terms, as an addition in relation. In your question, this marriage is of this kind.

I agree to accept that society has been very much conservative in this matter towards females, having attitudes mainly restricted to the kitchen and family. Those were the days when education was not in approach of all females and self-reliance was a dream to them. Those conditions began changing when the social revolution started and became successful after a lot of resistance. But still, the plight is not completely over because of male dominating attitudes. Even highly educated males are having such attitudes and their animal instincts dominate occasionally.

Now, after a few generations, the pathetic old conditions of females are changing their course, towards equality and equal terms because of the spread of education among them.

She looked at me differently for more. I continued. Please ignore the doubts and confusion because they kill the future and ruin life. Whatever we are at present, is because of our parents who were not knowing our futures and proceeded in their lives with positive attitudes. We always advance towards an unknown future and our positive attitudes pave the way. Everything will never be smooth and relations are tested in thick and thin. We should always remember that two are better than one to face any situation. One should give inspiration about satisfaction and cooperation. No one is perfect. So more doubt on self’s willpower and control may not bring anticipated results. Yes, there is no doubt that every relationship asks for sacrifice, ignorance, adjustments and tolerance up to a certain extent. The relationship of the mother always demands sacrifice. No one may help you here, beyond a limit because it is above all relationships. Even God needs her.

My views helped her a little. She expressed her doubts because of the unsuccessful marriages of her many friends. She said that most of them are facing court cases. So, she has many doubts. ” Many doubts make someone weak and may lead to loneliness,” I said. You should analyse your confidence before taking a final decision but take lessons from your parent’s life. It is true that relations give rights but brings responsibilities also and life is not like one-way traffic. We should drive carefully. Your words and attitudes play important roles in every relationship. If necessary, one should interfere, otherwise, silence is the best medicine. Honest discussions may bring solutions. If you give a chance someone to be a judge for solutions then one may add fuel to the fire as per his or her interests. Whatever, I have told, is not new but needs refreshments through any means. She smiled a little with a meaningful stare, this time. I thought this is the right time to strike at the right place. I told her that you were too thoughtful to spoil the meaningful life ahead. Moreover, your over consciousness is questioning your self-confidence. Perhaps, you are silently accepting and endorsing the old concepts and traditions related to the conditions of women who were ill-treated, most of the time as slaves. Moreover, educated and self-reliant ladies should take the lead to change the male-dominated society. Rest is in your mind to decide. But one thing, we should never forget that our mothers have made us despite limited liberties. You may also change the world in any circumstance.

Finally, I smiled and said that I could not anticipate your questions to be asked in my old age about future generations, which might have come into existence because of your cooperation and sacrifices. You may not kill God gifted instincts of any gender.

At last, I have a question for you- what will be your reaction if you find out that a girl is proposing to a boy for togetherness in future? You should note in any generation,  natural differences in males and females regarding physique, tenderness, nature, functions and responsibilities etc. may never change except in exceptional cases. You may face many such or other types of questions in times to come with more advancements and the spread of education.

This confession brought emotional reactions to her body from tip to toe. She smiled and proceeded on the important future venture in marriage with confidence. I am with her now blessed in madness in life.    

Return

I think that a suitable word denoting completion of a cycle is ” Return “. In a wheel, a point returns to its previous location in completion of one circle but it goes ahead and reaches to the location by repeating the cycle. This is applicable to all. No one can move without completing a cycle.

Nature is an open book, where a number of cycles are running continuously maintaining close coordination with each other. There are cycles in air, in the sea and within the earth. If any disturbance is detected its effects may be hazardous. The important seasonal cycle- summer – rain and winter, is well known on the earth. There may be a deviation in other parts of the earth. This cycle mainly depends on the temperature, cloud and wind. The wind cycle depends on the temperature, to carry clouds which depends on low-pressure zones to discharge water as rain. This season’s cycle along with another water’s cycle is the life of nature. Nature maintains her existence with the temperature and the water.

Every creature depends mainly on these cycles. Besides, there are the food cycle, growth cycle and many more essential cycles in nature. But the water cycle is important for sustainability. Nature frugally uses this valuable gift. Nature behaves like a miser. She uses water for creatures, stores water on the  earth for use and sends back surplus water to the ocean for maintaining the continuity of the cycle. Nature, for this, has a unique transportation system of rivers, leading to the ocean.

Nature is very kind. Nature is very cruel also. At last, nature takes all things back from her dwellers, whatever she releases from her warehouses. All creatures from  invisible to visible take essential items from the earth and surroundings for origin, growth and performing worldly duties. Nature very kindly support a life and supply essentials for sustainability. But she has defined return policies for her treasury. When a living thing becomes nonliving, her systems and agents get activated automatically at the proper time to take back all essentials used. The body decays and becomes useful for others. These cycles run continuously in nature.

Humans are also part of nature’s cycles. But they have a brain. They think, because of this, they have interfering qualities through thoughts, behaviours, emotions and greedy attitudes. They do not have their cycles to challenge nature but they have a sequence of karma (actions ) followed by fruits (results). In this sequence, karma controls the type of fruit and fruit may control the further course of actions followed by results to carry on the sequence which controls the life in the human kingdom. Karma is mainly controlled by attitudes, behaviours, surroundings and emotions. But the greed of humans plays a vital role in deciding the path of karma. Though humans, based on experience in the past, may anticipate the relationship between karma and results, yet they are disturbing nature. Humans are fully dependent on nature from day one to the last day of their lives. But in the name of sustainability, they are taking more from nature than they can return. Most of the resources are non-renewable and non- replenishing.

Nature has suffered from humans to the extent that her seasonal cycle and the water cycle have been disturbed the most. The results of karma are backfiring on humans and their existence is in danger. Nature is taking its course to sustain and is giving a warning to humans to be careful to change their thinking before it is too late.

We have potential beyond imagination. We have to rise to the occasion to limit our needs to a minimum. Otherwise, the fruits of actions will be annihilating. We may not save ourselves with all technological advancements. The return may be to the stone age but on the wheel of destruction what we are witnessing in the form of different types of wars between countries in the world. We are forgetting that our cycle is completed from the almighty to the almighty via natural duties with the assistance of nature made by the almighty. We are so intelligent that in this cycle of life we always fight for the existence of the almighty and we fight for my God and your God but we forget to define a human and humanity. We should celebrate a human day also for our sake. We should also think about fixing a day in the name of God, in a year, to remember that we are sons and daughters of only one God.

POOR- The bread givers

I am not poor. I am not only born with a belly and a mouth but also have two hands. Like every one, I took birth as raw but my parents were categorised as the  poor by human’s  prescribed standards. Since childhood, it appeared that I was special for specific purpose, as if, God had sent me for already continued assignments and I had to bear them as destiny. I was provided opportunities for own developments, on so determined  equal basis, in the name of education and health etc. with separate bases, as securities, for my category, according to my affordability and status.

When I grew with my situational fate, my views analysed that great God never differentiated and provided everyone with same biological qualities but the existing system on earth was human made in the name of management and necessities.

I think poor have a very traditional approach towards life but knowledge on the poor’s history is immaterial. Solutions are expected only from controllers, as provider. Now, I find that all needy are kind of poor and actual poor by categorisation are the foundation of all types of growth. They are the means of employments and engagements. Everyone may agree in principle that  the poverty is a curse, but I  think, it is a boon for many in the society. When I analyse, I observe that poor are bread and butter givers to many like writers, artists, painters, film makers, NGOs and government employees etc. Everyone of each category gives attention to the poor in her or his specialsation to expose plights and earns for own survival. Every government tries to eradicate poverty through schemes but the poorness is still continuing.

The poverty is a fire that is destined to give energy to all activities. Perhaps, not a single work can be done without the poor. We are paid for work but only sufficient for survival to carry on the livelihoods.

The  Poor are letters to start. The Poor are words for depictions. The Poor are sentences for complete meaning. The  Poor are necessities. All government’s schemes may not show the end of poverty because the implementors are very poor and they need more attentions. They always have their first bites from our dishes. So, our continuation appears to be permanent. We may be easily recognised every where without difficulty because of psychological reasons of our surrendering to the situations. We have no honor or place in society and  we are never treated to be honest. These are well accepted thoughts. The Poor are something for every section of society.

Being poor, I am proud that my fate enables me  to make fate of others. My share is with everyone as reminder for caring me. I expect that one day my complete share will reach to me before my departure from this opportunistic world. I want to be real rich person, complete in all respects without any camouflage. May every poor be like that free of small, dirty, poorly drained and stingy huts or small rooms with dilapidated walls in a distant  side of a city or town, as neglected habitats, contributing in richness of others.

Position

I will see you. You don’t know, who am I? You will bear the consequences. These are lines, generally heard  during discussions between any authority and someone on roads or in different offices. This reflects the approach of a man and the importance of a post. Such discussions reveal that someone is applying pressure to do the wrong or to get rid off punishment and penalties etc.

Here the question is about the importance of a  man or the post held by the man. It is true that every post has been empowered with rules and regulations, for good governance and importance of post is also as per hierarchy. But lines of threatening are hurdle and instigate corruption and mitigate the importance of rules, regulations and posts. The position held is not permanent and one day, on retirement, all become same in the society. So, the importance exists in post, not in the post holder. As a common man, ones importance is in abiding the rules and regulations. So, our behaviors are most important for respect and the tags of VIP and VVIP are not permanent. Good times do not last too long.

I remember one incident’s happening, during my  journey by train. One of my friends was with me, without proper reservation. He was having an importance of being son – in – law of an officer holding very high post in bureaucracy. Because of that he was feeling comfortable for facing the ticket checker and police. I got a very good lesson to tackle such situations. I witnessed that during discussion, after listening the threat of post and probable actions against him, the police man said ” you may be whatever you say but, at first, I will beat you and ask for an excuse from your relative officer by saying that every one tells your name and try to get favour and it is true, he does know.” My friend paid the fine and got lesson that post is important but with dignity.

Human and humanity should get importance because posts in various departments in governing bodies, are created for giving services to public and rules and regulations are framed for their smooth execution, to ease the life with safety and security. So, everyone is to satisfy importance of each other but no one is above law.

It is ridiculous to think that he is more important. Everyone is important. If we observe, we find that in nature everything is important, from invisible creatures to big mammals, from thorns to flowers,  and from grass to big trees etc. The ecology of nature is balanced because of all and any disturbance may bring havoc.

Human should learn from the best teacher, the nature, about giving place to everyone.
Our attitudes of giving importance are not limited to posts in service but also in every walk of life. Intelligent students get importance in classroom and schools, human get importance in society by comparing wealth, size of house and no of cars and number of servants etc.

There are different yard sticks for defining the importance, every where. Such attitudes are detrimental to the civilisations and empower to do the wrong things and corruptions spread as termites due to misuse of power. Only respect should get priority.

Everything is important. Everyone is important. When almighty has not differentiated, we may not do like this. Every creature is doing respective business and is equally important. We should not be power crazy. Services with serving attitudes should prevail.

FEAR

Fear has a natural and universal existence. Everyone may fear as if it is a permanent  pandemic. The  virus of this quality exists in every creature of nature. Perhaps no-one is spared from it.

There may be many types of fear as per the situation and condition. How can one guess, the time of start of any fear and its lasting? There may be descriptions in the concerned subject at length. But for me it starts since birth, related with existence and survival.

We are always in growing stage and fear changes according to expectations of self and society. We always face the challenges of proving self upto the mark.

The great fear may be from childish attitudes to study to delivering results to tolerance to family to social life etc. If you succumb at any time, the ready made judgement of failure or looser  will be your trade mark. No one will wait for your explanation until you again prove yourself.
One thing is common for all types of fear that every fear, ultimately, is directed towards one or self.

We always have fear of losing- self, friends, members of family, parents, relatives, health, wealth, near and dear ones and other important things. We may regain health and wealth but loss of persons is not like migratory birds those will come back repeatedly in particular season. It is natural and beyond our control. Such fear may lead to depression and ruin life. Others have consolation and nothing else to share to be useful in formulating strategies to get rid off load.

Fear is not a crime. It may give strength and opportunity to analyze  and overcome whatsoever may be, if it does not occupy the gigantic size, to be diagnosed as disease. We know nothing is  permanent. We also know there is no limit for maximum. So limit of satisfactions has to be fixed by individual as yardstick. We may overcome worldly fear like that.

If everything is going smoothly and is favorable then fear of maintenance and continuity complicate the things. Hence, it is very difficult to get rid off sense of fear. It will always remain together, in any form, as shadow. We should accept and try to learn its message to be ready for all odds.
We may always have sense of insecurity. So fear will continue till the last breath. Mental strength will make us feel better and more comfortable because fear is part and parcel of life.

If  fear is not there, we fear from unseen power. Most of the religious leaders describe it as God’s fear – the most powerful. It has self understood categorisation and trust, to be involved. It is becoming a contagious disease to control.

Best way to say bye bye to fear, may be, to be, what you are, without comparing with others to invite more unwanted trouble and long lasting sense of insecurity. Limit of satisfaction is the best medicine in many cases, to be less fear oriented, because fear does not give safe passage. One day fear becomes source  to   dare.