” I ” is a letter in the alphabet of the English language. ” I ” has also a meaning as a word. ” I ” has many qualities and influences a human the most. It may affect the brain and life of someone. It has very much vicious spiritual concerns.
It independently or with a combination of other words makes me feel proud, arrogant, self-oriented and stubborn. This keeps me away from exploring myself and keeps me alone in the crowd. I may not mingle with others. I may not understand anyone. I may not respect someone older or younger. I may not accept my everyday responsibilities. I, because of it, feel all in one and I get myself above all at the top. It has infused merciless pride in me because I think that I am the best of all. ” I ” has occupied my brain that much.
I think that ” I ” is the main culprit of all problems in this world. It is the reason for my ego and greed. This has generated a sense of insecurity in me. Because of this, I am losing myself and going away from everything and everyone. It appears like a simple small vertical line, but it may hide all human’s good qualities. It is cunning also. It has the psychological qualities to hide and expose them at the proper time without giving time to the opponents. The dominance of ” I ” in my head is a curse to me.
I want to know the reason for this issue of ” I ” and its inventor. Perhaps the feeling of ” I ” comes from within because of the issue of survival. In nature, according to experience, the fittest one survives. Survival may be the main issue. Otherwise, surrendering before a stronger one may be the only option to survive. This ” I ” makes someone a fighter. At last, ” I ” makes greedy, craving for maximum to dominate over others. Even then, despite all ill qualities like disease, I think that ” I ” has one good quality and that is to get rid of slavery. This ” I ” gives a sense of self-respect in certain cases.
When the self-centred attitudes inculcated by ” I ” are left, then the godly behaviours of someone may influence the whole world. When all bad notions of ” I ” are eliminated to make it ” we,” then a sense of one family appears in the mind. Then, it cares for everyone and shares everything. This ” I ” is the reason for my God and your God.
” I ” is a character. ” I ” is a psychological guide. ” I ” is a science of behaviour. ” I ” acts as a curtain before the eyes. ” I ” acts as a wall before the brain. ” I ” is like a shadow. ” I ” makes life treacherous. The dominance of ” I ” is a hurdle in movements toward spirituality. ” I ” keeps ego as a hindrance to thinking of God. ” I ” should be demolished in everyone’s mind from childhood. When we forget “I ” in us, everything appears to be pleasant and life becomes peace-loving. ” I ” is the reason for hell on the earth dividing and robbing everything given by God in the name of survival. Everyone should get rid of the destructive ” l ” to be happy, hopeful and useful for all.
FACTS
Everyone knows that status is not permanent. Who will not accept that position or condition may not change? It is also known that time is not multiplied. All such facts we know but in reality, we forget them and repent later on facing the situation. The almighty evolved the life in animal kingdom up to the highest level of humans with developed brains but without languages. The only common language controlled by nerves, continuing in humans everywhere, might be then in existence. All good or bad happenings and habits of the present day are the results of the experiences and needs of humans, faced in course of growth and development.
Human civilization has seen changes from the stone age to the present age of scientific achievements. The changes have been witnessed from mega-sized machines to smaller to nono machines. Developments have been made in many fields. Humans have started exploring planetary bodies and the universe. The weapons have changed from stones of the stone age to modern-day sophisticated weapons. Since then, enemies have changed from visible to invisible types affecting everyone. Most of the changes have been recorded in black and white.
It is also a fact that every new generation has the opportunity to reap the benefits of earlier generations’ developments and achievements without experiencing the efforts made and challenges faced.
One of the facts, I think to be true is the controlling age factor and old age in humans are meant for reviewing life and educating the present generation from their experiences. This age of mine has met a minimum of three generations.
We have seen the maximum changes in social bindings from the combined family to the nuclear family, from cooperative to self-centred attitudes- a deviation from share and care culture.
I remember one incident when I had joined service in a government office where I met the father of my friend. He told about his emotions after receiving his first salary in service. He had spent his salary on the purchase of clothing for his parents, grandparents, brothers and sisters. I was surprised to note his feelings because I had sent only half of my salary to my parents. My grandfather had given all his income to his mother every month.
Now, I have grown older and am on the verge of retirement and the new generation is joining the office. I have been surprised to note that most of them purchased costly cell phones from their first salary to show their status without considering the situation of families and moral duties. The new generation has seen from copy to computer and from pen to e-system directly in one go. The earlier employees used to go to their parental houses to reside after retirement. Later, comfort played a role and settlement started in cities. Now the service opportunities are centred in a few places and the concept of ancestor houses is vanishing fast for a new generation.
These changes have mostly affected the old aged persons who have time but no one to share their experiences and expertise of life. When I was in my fifties, I was relaxed, as my father was my advisor and guide for all problems and my mother’s affectionate touch and love were my heavens. I always remained a child for them and enjoyed their experiences. One thing I remember is that in their last days they were like children having short memories and stubborn habits. I became their guardian for them till their departure from this opportunistic world. Now the question is what about me? I have a vacuum. I know the silent, unknown and sad departure of one of my friends because his sons were unable to come to meet him in his dying days. His whole life he had been praising the achievements of his sons for his status in society. We could know about his departure when his body was lying in a closed house, crying for disposal with a foul smell. All statuses proved futile last time without any social security. I am also sailing in the same boat and am worried. I think local common residences or well-managed old age homes may be promising for all aged persons.
Now, the effects of changes are as such that the new generation is not having time for themselves or family. This generation is getting treated as machines in professional life. This generation is mainly active on social media for information, time-consuming likes or comments and relationships after working time. The relations are nearer at the fingertips of gadgets but are emotionally far away due to distress and competition to prove to be excellent and exceptional. Life has been marketed to introduce the best product leading to psychological problems. Their slogan is that this life will not be met a second time, so enjoy it. There should be a new methodology to work free of distress to keep humanity alive. This generation is very sensitive and well-equipped to have an identity.
All problems have not gathered in one generation. We are expecting too much from the new generation without a proper education system and syllabus etc. We are harping on the same string for a long time. We need introspection for the new generation which is more career oriented and wants to be independent of duties towards older generations for lack of ” me time ” and costly lifestyle. We may not make every new generation scapegoat for our faults in teaching them moral, social and spiritual, etc. values and the importance of united families. It is our responsibility for the new world given to the new generation.
Besides, I have seen many changes after the economic revolution, in this one life. We have done more harm than good to ourselves through uncontrolled developments for supremacy. We have maximum adversely affected environments both surrounding and natural. We have seen the extinction of many species of birds and animals. Effects on seasons are also causing more harm to humans through erratic behaviours.
Nothing is permanent. Nature has been revealed through evolution and selection. The fittest always survive. It is the open secret of nature. It is now our turn to cautiously evaluate the progress-related activities for humans’ comfortable existence and sustainability. Otherwise, transformations may be heinous to civilization.
We should observe that nature has distributed all her resources throughout the globe, perhaps with the definite intention of evolving cooperation among all humans, besides geographical differences, for survival and existence. We are witnessing, after the division of land and ocean as properties of different nations that no nation is self-sufficient to survive alone and needs cooperation. We should have progressive scientific thinking to excel.
We have changed. We are changing at our cost.
My Experience with Truth
I have had alarming experiences, in many aspects of life, with my growth in age and growing needs. But my experience with truth has a special place because it was compromising with the situation, despite having respect for morality. I have regrets for me revealing the facts that I have compelled myself many times to get the favour from virtual truth, in fact, the untruth.
I have followed the concept of flexibility according to convenience to fit into the so-called congenial atmosphere to abstain from falling into oblivion. Perhaps this concept is true for every field of work. Even path showing, knowledge imparting education system is not spared. That system of education which started in childhood at home has always emphasized following the right path of truth for happiness and generosity for society.
I am in my sixties but still remember the truth of the time when I was taught to understand and speak the language with my childish, entertaining, and joy-giving smile and imitating styles. I learned a lot depending on my retaining mental ability. Everything I interacted with and encountered during that time appeared to be true to me. The story of tortoise and rabbit was lesson-giving. The fairy tales and stars in the sky attracted me the most. I always waited for the magic to happen anywhere. Every day I got truth in various forms but the most valuable truth was my mother, always with me, forever for me. I still remember the day when I was sent to school to start earning certificates to be eligible to serve the country, my mother was with me in my comfort zone.
In my early days at school, my fabrication of the truth of home education started getting modified and I tried to adjust to a new environment. My mother waiting for me at the door and preparing my favourite dishes was my shadow on those difficult days. At last, I understood that all religions have the same principles for truth but for survival it was changed by us for situational practicability.
I have learned a lot from my mother’s views. Later both in student life and service life, I found two faces of truth, one hiding the other for benefit. Both appeared to be essential in day-to-day problems and dealings. Alas! the real truth got less volume in time and space. I could easily recognize victims of real truth followers, having a place in a dilapidated corner of the building, holding the high flag of satisfaction and peace. A ray of hope that truth always prevails in every situation, was witnessed many times with such victims. When one day any pious man noticed and recognized their values and importance then they were rescued and got the relevant status.
I have no hesitation in accepting that I have seen the flourishing candidates in all walks of life having upper hands due to their positions and relationships with men made extraordinary VIPs and following immoral, unlawful and unacceptable practices. But in the end real, defined, truth prevailed and the sufferer smiled. Those places where joy-giving sounds of untruth were entertained by masters and family members, ultimately succumbed to their truth and got ruined by the powerful time. There is a delay in his ( almighty ) house but injustice is intolerable. God’s mill grinds slowly but surely.
I have in my memory many examples of rising and falling in a single generation both in student and service lives. Such situations prevailed in past, are prevailing in present and will continue in the future also. I may give many examples from my experiences where truth ultimately won.
I, since my childhood, have been inspired by the story of a fairy tale- cinderella and always waited for such an incident to happen in respect of truth for its spread and acceptance the world over, for peace, love and sustainability.
I know the truth always prevails, I am sure it will always remain. It is in nature’s law of survival of the fittest. It is in the universe for the origin and existence of life on earth. It is in my thoughts. It is a string of untrue events being followed in all fields to excel and it breaks to expose as an eye opener for access to truth.
Truth is as important as breathing.
Truth is the worship of God. Truth hides but never sinks. Truth is a tool to distinguish between love and sorrow. Truth has to prevail for all. Truth is an individual’s habit. I have never searched for truth in fair weather friends and relatives. I am indebted to my mother for truth and its necessity. I am continuing to be with her in memory and experience.
The real truth may never change with technological advancements. Truth is a true inspiring tool to bring heaven on earth.
My shadow
Because of me and myself, I have a shadow. My shadow is best companion of me in day or in light. It is black and unseen in dark. I have virtual shadow in night. My shadow increases and decreases in size owing to source and distance of light. I may have many shadows as per number of sources of light. I am in grief that I may not have shadow in dark and in the sky. I may not give colours to it.
My shadow helps me alone in deciding many things. I get knowledge of directions and probable distance of source of light except the distance of Sun. My shadow always has its identity, except one time it has lost its identity informing me because shadow- shadow interaction began for third shadow. Now my shadow is not in my control.
My shadow has no life but has the philosophy of life. Outer shadow needs outer source of light but inner shadow needs own enlightenment because problems of world are due to internal shadow. Our attitudes, thoughts, actions and interactions are controlled by this shadow. My physical shadow shows directions and distance but inner shadow makes blind and covers self consciousness. Inner shadow is limited to self body, but affects the surroundings. I have to search peace. I have to spare me from immoral things. I have to be immortal from mortality. I have to be selfless. I have to be of use for others. I have to leave arrogance. I have to search and follow truth. I have to overcome my inner shadow for all these changes. Every thing is within.
My outer shadow will not be with me forever but inner shadow may make my life heavenly on earth. I have to meet a path shower guru ( teacher ). I have to do noble deeds. I have to be me first, for others.
I read books. I got confused. Every book had its limitation. No book was complete in itself. Some books were for allurements. Some books were self praising.
Ultimately, I have a thought and concluded as under – that worldly duties should be performed in pious manner without harming anyone. I can change the world but I have to change first. Smiling face, soft words, and ready to help attitudes give peace and make life easy. Only deed should speak. Name should be used for identity and not for boasting. No one will carry any thing at the time of departure from this world. So attitude of hoarding should be beyond mind. Opportunities should be shared and needy should get first preference. Everyone should respect each other and should behave as servant, not the master.
All these are possible but inner shadow should be in control through fact finding and removing all greedy attitudes. One should have faith in self. Nothing is mine forever. Everyone is important. Everyone is a tourist in the world and is on tourist visa for certain duration. If I help someone, it means I have helped myself. Such attitudes may be sufficient for control of inner shadow’s hunger. I am ready to bear the fruits of my deeds. I have hope. I have to Judge myself, other may not truly judge me. May God bless me and my soul rest in peace on earth and in heaven.
I know that God is great but I have to give him the chance.
THAT DAY – A STORY FOR CHANGE
That day, I was witnessing the other face of her mild appearance. Till that time, she was in dilemma, to continue in that city or not. I knew her, as she was one of my classmates. She was not the front or back bencher. Her favourite place was in the middle but I preferred back bench for my comfort in the classroom. I had attitude from very beginning, which still continued, to wait and watch, before making companion, then friend if frequency matched. Because of that, I had only a few friends.
She became my friend one day, after many long discussions on life and its meaning. She was serious and I was always in light, joyous mood to have concentration. I had my style. One day, I dared to ask about her liking for the middle bench in the classroom. That day, I had seen, for the first time, a light mood in her, when she smiled and said to have balance between ups and downs. I had guessed that that had been a serious smile. Life needed balance to exist in this biased world for females, leaving homes for a cause – she said. That day she told about the reason of her special psychology.
She had revolted in her conservative family of a village, for higher study in university and was meeting her needs by self employment. I had got not sympathy but honours for her, since that day.
Naturally, I became more supportive to her. I could not be her shadow but a good friend was in me for her.
That day, I had seen that she had cried, as her father had given ultimatum to be back to village for marriage. Marriage was the sole responsibility of her father who was impatient to complete it for the sake of village and community. She had refused but her mother, who was supportive to her, came to settle the issue. I had met her mother, as mediator for her dreams. I got that tradition was the hindrance. She did not want to be in house, helpless like mother and grandmother fully dependent on males whether husband, brothers or sons. She knew that education could only break the ice. Her mother was worried about getting a match in community after her higher qualification.
That day, she had broken on her fate in the hands of males. She wanted to change her destiny. I knew that she was really nervous. I was also helpless. She looked towards me. I could not face her, as I was also student. Her eyes asked support. That language was silent.
That day, I immediately met to an NGO supporting females for education. She was recognised for her will and new light of hope in her life and for many other females. She grabbed the opportunity. Her mother blessed and left with encouraging words to not forget rituals and be the example, for others.
She was finally left alone to sail in the world. She started a job in the same NGO after completion of education. I was also earning in the same city and frequently meeting her as friend.
One day, during discussion it was concluded that present engagement was not the end of the tunnel. It was decided to hold commanding position through administrative services. Due to her firm attitudes, commitment and continuous preparation, she was finally on an important chair to deliver for betterment of others.
She was glorified for her achievements. The leader of her community felicitated her. Her father and relatives were abstaining from her because of their egos. But that barrier was broken when she reached her village to lay foundation stone for girls school. Her motivational speech, encouraged girls and villagers took pledge to send their girls out of village for higher education. It was a sea change in the village’s history. She was given credit for her foresightedness that education was important weapon to change destiny. Her father was also getting respect from officials and villagers. She was accepted by her father who was repenting on his traditional attitudes, under pressure of community.
I was happy to note my role in the whole changes in a life and for a good cause. But that was not the end for me. One day, in an auto taxi she reached to my office without security and entered into my chamber hurriedly. To my utter surprise, she called my home’s nick name, lovingly given by my mother. She took a seat before me and without any hitch, told that she did not want discussions on life any more, that day, because she had discussed a lot with me. She wanted to give her life and took someone’s life. She wanted to give meaning and momentum to her life for future and continuity of her legacy. I told that I could not help in that extremely private matter. She laughed and said that was our matter and no one else was involved. She had decided to give ritualistic name to our friendship for social acceptance. I discussed a lot but she had taken permission from my parents. She was knowing that I had denied marrying many times. That day, she was woman of substance, eager to excell in all aspects of life. That day, her smile attacked on my nerves. I was the sailor for her – yours faithfully.
Ultimately, she took my hand and my life for her to be one. The good deeds continued. Story of life began and got meaning by the grace of almighty for others, from that day.
We were reciprocal to each other
santable 